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Many years ago I was introduced to hypnosis and hypnotherapy through a college classmate that was a professional hypnotherapist. Over the years I've used hypnosis and hypnotherapy to help myself and thousands of other people make significant positive changes in our lives.
Hypnosis isn't magic. In fact there's really nothing too mysterious about it at all. Hypnosis is a method of self help that has been used for thousands of years and by millions of people. Simply put, hypnosis is a method you can use to alter your thoughts and, as a result, your behaviors.
Hypnosis doesn't discriminate, meaning anyone can use it. Its benefits are available to anyone of any ethnic or religious background. It can be used by people of all ages and by both sexes. From stress relief to weight loss, there are self improvement hypnosis programs for you.
The great thing about using hypnosis as a self help program is that it's a do it to your self project. For many things you don't need a trained professional, but you use the same techniques that a hypnotherapist would.
Using hypnosis as a self help method can be contrary to much of our modern philosophy. Today it seems that many people want the "quick fix", so they take the latest pharmaceuticals for whatever ails them. While popping pills can be an effective short term solution, unless you have an infection, they do nothing for most of the underlying causes of stress or fitness or whatever you are trying to change. In fact, most pharmaceuticals, if taken for long periods of time, have been proven to be extremely harmful. So, unless you have a specific medical condition that necessitates you using drugs, its recommend you stay away from them.
When it comes to self improvement there are a couple of prerequisites for hypnosis or hypnotherapy to be effective. The first is you have to be open-minded that hypnosis is a useful self help treatment. Of course if you're not open minded you probably won't even try hypnosis to begin with.
The second is that you have to believe that it will work or at least suspend your disbelief that it won't work. Studies have actually found that any treatment for self improvement, hypnosis, drugs or whatever work best if you believe in them. The more you believe in the ability of hypnotherapy to help you, the higher your chances of success. If you think its all fluff then it is, and you're just wasting your time. That's because you're programming your mind for failure in advance. If there is any secret to making hypnosis work it's this - you'll get as much out of it as you believe you will.
When using hypnosis for self help, in the beginning it may help for you to have some guidance through the process. One method is using self improvement hypnosis recordings.
If you are using self improvement hypnosis recordings for stress reduction a good strategy is to try to get away from the hustle and bustle of the day so that you can get into a more relaxed state. Many people actually carry their self improvement hypnosis recordings with them as they go about their day. This way when the day does turn chaotic, they can quickly return to a calming state without anyone ever knowing they were treating themselves for stress reduction! Even a short ten or fifteen minute recording can help.
As mentioned before, you want to get rid of your distractions before listening to your self improvement hypnosis recordings because they'll just add to your stress. Finding a quiet place will allow you to focus on the techniques in the recording. Turn off your radio, your television, and especially your cell phone while you're conducting your self improvement hypnosis. Dedicate this time entirely to your well-being.
Another thing many people use self improvement hypnosis for is weight control. If you're using self improvement hypnosis recordings as part of your weight loss program a good time to use them is when you feel weakness in your resolve to exercise or eat more healthily. They are an excellent method of adding to your resolve of staying on your healthier eating and exercise schedule.
In order for your self improvement hypnosis to work, allow yourself to focus for a minimum of 15 minutes. Although many people find it hard to devote a single second to their own needs, if you want to change your thoughts, you have to work on it just as you would any other learning experience. So commit to dedicating this time to learning how to best use your self improvement hypnosis.
If you're not using a recording while you're in this relaxed state, you can give yourself suggestions about how you want to behave and then use positive visualization to "see" your life as you want it to be. For example, visualize yourself in a place so relaxing that there is no stress or if you're trying to become more fit use positive visualization to "see" yourself at the weight and in the shape you want to be.
As you start using hypnosis as a method for self help you'll find that, with practice, your subconscious mind will begin adopting those suggestions. Then, each day, as you use your self improvement hypnosis, they'll be nurtured until they grow large enough to become what's normal for you. Soon, your new behaviors will have become habits and you'll only need to call upon self improvement hypnosis for a refresher every now and then.
If you want to use start using self improvement hypnosis a good place to start is with a qualified hypnotherapist. If you are looking for one in your area shoot me an e-mail, I know some excellent practicing hypnotists around the world. It doesn't matter if you want a weight loss hypnosis program, stress reduction or a time proven method to quit smoking, a self improvement hypnosis program can quickly help you make life altering changes in your life.
Wednesday, September 29, 2010
Monday, September 27, 2010
Spiritual Self Help Books Are Different
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Self-help books abound in bookstores all over the world. The first category are self-help books on a wide range of titles from how to look after your plants, build a playpen, to starting a small business. Then, in the second category, there are self-help books on how to develop a positive mindset to creating financial abundance. But the third category, spiritual self-help books stand in a class of its own.
Let me point out how these self-help books are different. I will not go into the first category of "how to books" because you can add endless titles to this category and the titles are self-explanatory. However I will highlight how the second category of self-help books differ from spiritual self-help books.
The second category
In this category, the main objective of these self-help books is to make your life easier so most of them concentrate on providing a list of things you must do in order to achieve a goal, be it stress management or staying positive. Based on the objective, these books provide advice and suggestions on how to succeed in the subjects covered.
Spiritual self-help books are different
Here the subjects, approach and depth of coverage are different. The subjects cover life and its meaning, life after death, the self, the importance of self-knowledge, how you are responsible for creating all your experiences and how you can create experiences you want. The subjects also include God and our relationship with Him.
The message that runs through these self-help books is that we are one and we affect others and everything on this planet. It calls for self-awareness, love and respect for everyone and everything.
These books reminds you that you are magnificent creators and can create and live the life of your dreams by consciously and deliberately choosing positive thoughts, words, feelings and actions. They do not just provide you with a list of "how to's" but go in depth to explain how you are creating your lives so that you will realize clearly how you are the problem and the solution. From this self-realization, you will quit feeling that life is unfair and you can start to take charge of your life knowing God has given you the powerful gift of creating your own experiences.
You graduate to spiritual self-help books
In my personal experience, I began reading the first category of self-help books in the earlier years of my personal growth. I began my working career reading books on subjects such as how to improve my memory, how to develop self-confidence, how to improve my public-speaking abilities. Then I moved on to reading books on how to achieve success, how to manage stress and how to become a millionaire.
In later years, I gravitated to reading books by spiritual gurus like Deepak Chopra who wrote on the Seven Spiritual Laws of Success, Grow Younger, Live Longer, Synchrodestiny and Life After Death. These books highlighted the interconnectedness of life and the power of your thoughts and beliefs to create your reality.
My personal growth progression is also reflected in the books I have written. My first book title was "You Are What You Believe," a book on how to program your mind for success through the use of positive affirmations for 50 different situations. Later on, my inward journey led me to write my second book, a spiritual self-help book "Know Yourself - The Truth Will Set You Free," which is a guided journey towards self-realization and the endless rewards that will follow. When you know yourself and use your creative powers to realize your dreams, your spirit will be set free and you will live life joyously. My third book which will be published sometime in 2010, is "Now Is The Time," which is a call to value the present moment and to create your future now.
Self-help books abound in bookstores all over the world. The first category are self-help books on a wide range of titles from how to look after your plants, build a playpen, to starting a small business. Then, in the second category, there are self-help books on how to develop a positive mindset to creating financial abundance. But the third category, spiritual self-help books stand in a class of its own.
Let me point out how these self-help books are different. I will not go into the first category of "how to books" because you can add endless titles to this category and the titles are self-explanatory. However I will highlight how the second category of self-help books differ from spiritual self-help books.
The second category
In this category, the main objective of these self-help books is to make your life easier so most of them concentrate on providing a list of things you must do in order to achieve a goal, be it stress management or staying positive. Based on the objective, these books provide advice and suggestions on how to succeed in the subjects covered.
Spiritual self-help books are different
Here the subjects, approach and depth of coverage are different. The subjects cover life and its meaning, life after death, the self, the importance of self-knowledge, how you are responsible for creating all your experiences and how you can create experiences you want. The subjects also include God and our relationship with Him.
The message that runs through these self-help books is that we are one and we affect others and everything on this planet. It calls for self-awareness, love and respect for everyone and everything.
These books reminds you that you are magnificent creators and can create and live the life of your dreams by consciously and deliberately choosing positive thoughts, words, feelings and actions. They do not just provide you with a list of "how to's" but go in depth to explain how you are creating your lives so that you will realize clearly how you are the problem and the solution. From this self-realization, you will quit feeling that life is unfair and you can start to take charge of your life knowing God has given you the powerful gift of creating your own experiences.
You graduate to spiritual self-help books
In my personal experience, I began reading the first category of self-help books in the earlier years of my personal growth. I began my working career reading books on subjects such as how to improve my memory, how to develop self-confidence, how to improve my public-speaking abilities. Then I moved on to reading books on how to achieve success, how to manage stress and how to become a millionaire.
In later years, I gravitated to reading books by spiritual gurus like Deepak Chopra who wrote on the Seven Spiritual Laws of Success, Grow Younger, Live Longer, Synchrodestiny and Life After Death. These books highlighted the interconnectedness of life and the power of your thoughts and beliefs to create your reality.
My personal growth progression is also reflected in the books I have written. My first book title was "You Are What You Believe," a book on how to program your mind for success through the use of positive affirmations for 50 different situations. Later on, my inward journey led me to write my second book, a spiritual self-help book "Know Yourself - The Truth Will Set You Free," which is a guided journey towards self-realization and the endless rewards that will follow. When you know yourself and use your creative powers to realize your dreams, your spirit will be set free and you will live life joyously. My third book which will be published sometime in 2010, is "Now Is The Time," which is a call to value the present moment and to create your future now.
Sunday, September 26, 2010
Subjective Relationships
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“What is the primary goal?” “You should know, Professor. You programmed me.” – War Games
Well… this 30-day trial of inspiration is absolutely amazing. I’m so far down the rabbit hole of subjective reality that I can perceive little else but rabbits now. And there sure are a LOT of rabbits down here!
Today is technically Day 12 of this experiment. That seems ridiculous to me. How could so much have changed in only 12 days? The pacing of life has become almost unfathomable compared to what it was like before. I feel like I’ve lived through the mental and emotional equivalent of about 3 months in less than 2 weeks. Each day is like a week in terms of the density of its intensity.
I know this is a long update (over 7400 words), but it still barely scratches the surface of what’s been happening. Fortunately you don’t actually have to read it. I’ll simply dream that I get to read and digest your reactions to this as if you’d read it. But they won’t even be your reactions because there’s no you. I’ll be hearing the echoing projections of my own inner reactions to what I’m sharing with myself. I can accept that. I still need to write all of this down for my own processing reasons. My mind needs some time to digest the events of the past week.
Fragile Tension
For some reason I now own an iPad. Why do I have an iPad? I’m not really sure. I wouldn’t have gotten one for objective reasons, but I had to get one in order to stick to the rules of this experiment.
l feel like Riker in the ST:TNG episode “Frame of Mind” saying, “I still have a phaser… why do I have a phaser?” (If you don’t get that reference, go download the Star Trek files to your character’s database.)
I went out Friday night to run some usual errands. At least I thought they were usual. It was the first time I went out since I dreamt that I flew back from Santa Fe last Monday. By Friday I was more immersed in my experiment than ever. I even felt inspired to do these errands at the time. I was also nearly out of dream food, so I was going to hit Costco and Whole Foods to do a typical food shop.
The errands may have been typical, but I wasn’t my usual self. I’d been holding the subjective reality perspective for days on end. As I went to my garage to get in my car, I reminded myself that this was a dream world. It’s funny that my dream car is a 2010 Hyundai Sonata. Perhaps I need to upgrade my imagination. Then again, I like the car, and it runs great, so as far as dream cars go, it’s not bad.
Something was very different. Driving my car wasn’t the same, nor was shopping. I’d normally find such experiences rather boring, but now I was filled with child-like wonder. Everything was fresh and new and exciting. In a dream world, anything can happen, so I was keeping myself energetically open and receptive, not knowing what to expect.
I bought mostly fresh produce, but then on impulse I randomly grabbed a few bottles of wine — three of them. That’s very odd behavior for me. In the past I’d typically drink wine once or twice a year. But now it was just dream wine, and it seemed like a fun thing to buy at the time, especially since I’d be paying with dream money. I didn’t even look at what I was buying. I just randomly grabbed some bottles and placed them into my cart. I barely noticed what kind or color. I just pulled whatever I felt drawn to.
The wine ranged in price from $7 to $13 per bottle. One was a 2005 Spanish red wine. I don’t think I’ve ever had Spanish wine before, and the type wasn’t something I’d ever heard of. When I had some later, it turned out it was really good, just the right blend of mild sweetness and tartness and not too acidic. Dream wine apparently tastes better than the real stuff. But given that my dream alcohol tolerance is so low, I felt tipsy even after one glass. Why? Because I believed it would affect me like that, and so it did. If you dream that a substance affects you, your mind creates the effect you expect.
When I checked out at Costco, the female dream clerk and her helper were extra friendly and flirtatious — and hot — so I flirted back. It got a bit silly. That’s unusual for Costco, but I shrugged it off and left the store. Hot people working at Costco? Hmmm… unusual but not unheard of. Even so, it got my attention.
After Costco, I had a strong urge to pop over to the dream Best Buy, which was nearby in the same shopping center. I felt I was supposed to go buy an iPad. Why? No idea. It seemed like a cool device, but logically I didn’t perceive a strong need for one, although I do feel it would be cool to travel with one, so I can leave my heavier Macbook Pro at home. I went to the Apple section of the store. It was around 9:00pm dream time, and no one was there. I said, “Ok, inspiration, which model should I get?” It said to get the best, so I presumed that meant the 64GB model with WiFi and 3G. There were no boxes sitting out, so I went to hunt for a dream character employee. The store was mostly deserted, so I went to the front of the store and found the guy by the exit. I asked if they had any iPads in stock. He grimaced and said, “Not sure… let me check.”
He uses a small microphone to ask someone else if they have any iPads in stock. Then he looks at me disappointed and says, “He says we only have the 64GB/3G model in stock,” as if no one would ever want that one. I said, “Great! That’s the one I want. Tell him to bring me one, and I’ll meet him at the register.”
I buy it, and I’m extra chatty with the male clerk. I know I’m looking at him strangely because I don’t think he’s a real person separate from me. He’s a character in this dream world. The interaction is so easy and smooth that afterwards I feel like I could have hit on him and gotten his phone number if I wanted to, and that he’d happily give it to me. I’m totally straight, but I think it would have been fun to try. Instead I settle for a $10 discount on the iPad keyboard and another discount on the total order. I didn’t ask for either discount — he just gave them to me. Apparently dream shopping is a little cheaper than regular shopping.
Next I go to Whole Foods. I buy almost all raw food there aside from two cans of organic veggie soup. Overall I buy the foods I believe are healthiest and that I’ll enjoy, knowing that my dream body will simulate the best reactions to those foods.
While I’m in the produce section bagging up some organic apples, an older guy comes up to me and asks me if I work there. When I tell him no, he apologizes and gives me a very strange look. I felt like he was asking me something other than the surface question though, more like, “Are you the guy in charge of this dream?” It did not feel like a normal human interaction the way it played out. I continue my shop with the suspicious feeling that he’s on to me.
As I’m about to leave Whole Foods, I get the impulse to see if they have any vegan pizza slices left in the food service section. I haven’t had dinner yet, and I figure a couple slices would go down nicely. But then I have the inspired thought that I’d love to get a whole pizza to take home with me, so I can have leftovers the next day as well, but I don’t want to wait 20-25 minutes for them to make one since I’m ready to check out and go home. I walk over to that area to take a look, and the guy had just put out a whole fresh vegan pizza with red onion, green and yellow peppers, mushrooms, and black olives. Too perfect — and very strange since the store seemed deserted, and it was only 30 minutes till closing. Did they expect to sell that many slices of vegan pizza in the final 30 minutes on a Friday night? I don’t see how they’d even come close.
I ask the guy if I can have the whole pizza, and he happily consents and boxes it up for me. Nice timing, I think to myself.
I go to the only register that’s still open. The female clerk is gorgeous, friendly, and flirty, and our interaction is fun and playful. Those kinds of interactions aren’t unusual for me, but this one was smoother and more flowing than usual. I felt like I was interacting with a dream character, a projection of my own subconscious, and that changed the nature of the interaction. It’s very hard to describe how it was different, but it just wasn’t the same as before. The interaction was completely frictionless. There was no sense of any expectation, judgment, or concern with what the other person was thinking. Communicating from a place of such emptiness is very simple and easy. It’s just like talking to a character in a lucid dream.
I went home with a feeling that something had shifted. But that was only the beginning.
The pizza was really good too. I made Rachelle envious by eating it while I video-Skyped with her later that night, occasionally offering her a virtual bite. She got me back big time though… by teasingly offering me virtual bites of her. And I know just how delicious she is.
“What is the primary goal?” “You should know, Professor. You programmed me.” – War Games
Well… this 30-day trial of inspiration is absolutely amazing. I’m so far down the rabbit hole of subjective reality that I can perceive little else but rabbits now. And there sure are a LOT of rabbits down here!
Today is technically Day 12 of this experiment. That seems ridiculous to me. How could so much have changed in only 12 days? The pacing of life has become almost unfathomable compared to what it was like before. I feel like I’ve lived through the mental and emotional equivalent of about 3 months in less than 2 weeks. Each day is like a week in terms of the density of its intensity.
I know this is a long update (over 7400 words), but it still barely scratches the surface of what’s been happening. Fortunately you don’t actually have to read it. I’ll simply dream that I get to read and digest your reactions to this as if you’d read it. But they won’t even be your reactions because there’s no you. I’ll be hearing the echoing projections of my own inner reactions to what I’m sharing with myself. I can accept that. I still need to write all of this down for my own processing reasons. My mind needs some time to digest the events of the past week.
Fragile Tension
For some reason I now own an iPad. Why do I have an iPad? I’m not really sure. I wouldn’t have gotten one for objective reasons, but I had to get one in order to stick to the rules of this experiment.
l feel like Riker in the ST:TNG episode “Frame of Mind” saying, “I still have a phaser… why do I have a phaser?” (If you don’t get that reference, go download the Star Trek files to your character’s database.)
I went out Friday night to run some usual errands. At least I thought they were usual. It was the first time I went out since I dreamt that I flew back from Santa Fe last Monday. By Friday I was more immersed in my experiment than ever. I even felt inspired to do these errands at the time. I was also nearly out of dream food, so I was going to hit Costco and Whole Foods to do a typical food shop.
The errands may have been typical, but I wasn’t my usual self. I’d been holding the subjective reality perspective for days on end. As I went to my garage to get in my car, I reminded myself that this was a dream world. It’s funny that my dream car is a 2010 Hyundai Sonata. Perhaps I need to upgrade my imagination. Then again, I like the car, and it runs great, so as far as dream cars go, it’s not bad.
Something was very different. Driving my car wasn’t the same, nor was shopping. I’d normally find such experiences rather boring, but now I was filled with child-like wonder. Everything was fresh and new and exciting. In a dream world, anything can happen, so I was keeping myself energetically open and receptive, not knowing what to expect.
I bought mostly fresh produce, but then on impulse I randomly grabbed a few bottles of wine — three of them. That’s very odd behavior for me. In the past I’d typically drink wine once or twice a year. But now it was just dream wine, and it seemed like a fun thing to buy at the time, especially since I’d be paying with dream money. I didn’t even look at what I was buying. I just randomly grabbed some bottles and placed them into my cart. I barely noticed what kind or color. I just pulled whatever I felt drawn to.
The wine ranged in price from $7 to $13 per bottle. One was a 2005 Spanish red wine. I don’t think I’ve ever had Spanish wine before, and the type wasn’t something I’d ever heard of. When I had some later, it turned out it was really good, just the right blend of mild sweetness and tartness and not too acidic. Dream wine apparently tastes better than the real stuff. But given that my dream alcohol tolerance is so low, I felt tipsy even after one glass. Why? Because I believed it would affect me like that, and so it did. If you dream that a substance affects you, your mind creates the effect you expect.
When I checked out at Costco, the female dream clerk and her helper were extra friendly and flirtatious — and hot — so I flirted back. It got a bit silly. That’s unusual for Costco, but I shrugged it off and left the store. Hot people working at Costco? Hmmm… unusual but not unheard of. Even so, it got my attention.
After Costco, I had a strong urge to pop over to the dream Best Buy, which was nearby in the same shopping center. I felt I was supposed to go buy an iPad. Why? No idea. It seemed like a cool device, but logically I didn’t perceive a strong need for one, although I do feel it would be cool to travel with one, so I can leave my heavier Macbook Pro at home. I went to the Apple section of the store. It was around 9:00pm dream time, and no one was there. I said, “Ok, inspiration, which model should I get?” It said to get the best, so I presumed that meant the 64GB model with WiFi and 3G. There were no boxes sitting out, so I went to hunt for a dream character employee. The store was mostly deserted, so I went to the front of the store and found the guy by the exit. I asked if they had any iPads in stock. He grimaced and said, “Not sure… let me check.”
He uses a small microphone to ask someone else if they have any iPads in stock. Then he looks at me disappointed and says, “He says we only have the 64GB/3G model in stock,” as if no one would ever want that one. I said, “Great! That’s the one I want. Tell him to bring me one, and I’ll meet him at the register.”
I buy it, and I’m extra chatty with the male clerk. I know I’m looking at him strangely because I don’t think he’s a real person separate from me. He’s a character in this dream world. The interaction is so easy and smooth that afterwards I feel like I could have hit on him and gotten his phone number if I wanted to, and that he’d happily give it to me. I’m totally straight, but I think it would have been fun to try. Instead I settle for a $10 discount on the iPad keyboard and another discount on the total order. I didn’t ask for either discount — he just gave them to me. Apparently dream shopping is a little cheaper than regular shopping.
Next I go to Whole Foods. I buy almost all raw food there aside from two cans of organic veggie soup. Overall I buy the foods I believe are healthiest and that I’ll enjoy, knowing that my dream body will simulate the best reactions to those foods.
While I’m in the produce section bagging up some organic apples, an older guy comes up to me and asks me if I work there. When I tell him no, he apologizes and gives me a very strange look. I felt like he was asking me something other than the surface question though, more like, “Are you the guy in charge of this dream?” It did not feel like a normal human interaction the way it played out. I continue my shop with the suspicious feeling that he’s on to me.
As I’m about to leave Whole Foods, I get the impulse to see if they have any vegan pizza slices left in the food service section. I haven’t had dinner yet, and I figure a couple slices would go down nicely. But then I have the inspired thought that I’d love to get a whole pizza to take home with me, so I can have leftovers the next day as well, but I don’t want to wait 20-25 minutes for them to make one since I’m ready to check out and go home. I walk over to that area to take a look, and the guy had just put out a whole fresh vegan pizza with red onion, green and yellow peppers, mushrooms, and black olives. Too perfect — and very strange since the store seemed deserted, and it was only 30 minutes till closing. Did they expect to sell that many slices of vegan pizza in the final 30 minutes on a Friday night? I don’t see how they’d even come close.
I ask the guy if I can have the whole pizza, and he happily consents and boxes it up for me. Nice timing, I think to myself.
I go to the only register that’s still open. The female clerk is gorgeous, friendly, and flirty, and our interaction is fun and playful. Those kinds of interactions aren’t unusual for me, but this one was smoother and more flowing than usual. I felt like I was interacting with a dream character, a projection of my own subconscious, and that changed the nature of the interaction. It’s very hard to describe how it was different, but it just wasn’t the same as before. The interaction was completely frictionless. There was no sense of any expectation, judgment, or concern with what the other person was thinking. Communicating from a place of such emptiness is very simple and easy. It’s just like talking to a character in a lucid dream.
I went home with a feeling that something had shifted. But that was only the beginning.
The pizza was really good too. I made Rachelle envious by eating it while I video-Skyped with her later that night, occasionally offering her a virtual bite. She got me back big time though… by teasingly offering me virtual bites of her. And I know just how delicious she is.
Need Some Self Esteem Self Help? - 3 Self Esteem Self Help Tips
Could not find default endpoint element that references contract 'TranslatorService.LanguageService' in the ServiceModel client configuration section. This might be because no configuration file was found for your application, or because no endpoint element matching this contract could be found in the client element.
If you are looking for self esteem self help then look no further! Self esteem is basically our self concept of, and how how we view ourselves. Many people have a very poor image of themselves and this can result in self esteem problem. The following advice is a series of tips that when used together will bring you to a much better place, bursting with self esteem and experiencing life as you never have before!
Need Some Self Esteem Self Help? - 3 Self Esteem Self Help Tips
1) Seek Approval From Within - So many causes of low self esteem are due to people seeking approval from others. This is not good, in fact it is terrible! If you do then you are giving other people the power to control how you feel, i don't know about you but just the thought of that makes me feel horrible! You need to learn how to seek approval from only yourself, and that it does not matter what other people think of you. This is very basic but important self esteem self help.
2) Push Your Comfort Zone - Some of the most pertinent self esteem self help, as well as life long advice i could give you is push your comfort zone till the day you die. Be willing to take a risk and do something you are uncertain about or afraid of doing. Your self esteem will benefit greatly from this as this is pushing your current boundaries and achieving what you could not before, and as the old saying goes, who dares wins.
3) Follow Your own Compass - Find out what your passions in life are....and follow them! If you are stuck in a boring job and feeling no excitement for life then of course you will have low self esteem. By discovering your purpose, the things that excite you, and doing them then THAT is when you will start to get massive boosts in self esteem and happiness. Follow your compass, that little voice inside your head as it is always right.
I know that if you are after self esteem self help then please follow the information above as it will really help!
If you are looking for self esteem self help then look no further! Self esteem is basically our self concept of, and how how we view ourselves. Many people have a very poor image of themselves and this can result in self esteem problem. The following advice is a series of tips that when used together will bring you to a much better place, bursting with self esteem and experiencing life as you never have before!
Need Some Self Esteem Self Help? - 3 Self Esteem Self Help Tips
1) Seek Approval From Within - So many causes of low self esteem are due to people seeking approval from others. This is not good, in fact it is terrible! If you do then you are giving other people the power to control how you feel, i don't know about you but just the thought of that makes me feel horrible! You need to learn how to seek approval from only yourself, and that it does not matter what other people think of you. This is very basic but important self esteem self help.
2) Push Your Comfort Zone - Some of the most pertinent self esteem self help, as well as life long advice i could give you is push your comfort zone till the day you die. Be willing to take a risk and do something you are uncertain about or afraid of doing. Your self esteem will benefit greatly from this as this is pushing your current boundaries and achieving what you could not before, and as the old saying goes, who dares wins.
3) Follow Your own Compass - Find out what your passions in life are....and follow them! If you are stuck in a boring job and feeling no excitement for life then of course you will have low self esteem. By discovering your purpose, the things that excite you, and doing them then THAT is when you will start to get massive boosts in self esteem and happiness. Follow your compass, that little voice inside your head as it is always right.
I know that if you are after self esteem self help then please follow the information above as it will really help!
Saturday, September 25, 2010
Moving Beyond Copyright
Email this article to a friend
An inspired idea came to me today, one that struck me multiple times over the past few years. Until today I couldn’t bring myself to act on it. Now I’m ready to move forward with it.
The short version is that I’m going to give people permission to republish my articles far and wide, including translating them into other languages. In practical terms this means that I won’t be “protecting” them via copyright anymore.
I want to move forward on this, but I want to do it in such a way that it makes sense and doesn’t create undesirable complications. So I’m going to share the basics with you now. Then I’ll gather questions and feedback and see if I can craft a good solution that addresses people’s questions, so we can fill in all the gaps about the implementation details.
Copyrighted Material
Up to this point, all of my articles have been copyrighted. I’ve written about 1,000 articles, and I’d estimate they average about 2,000 words each, so that’s approximately 2 million words of content, enough to fill 25 books. It took me nearly 6 years to produce that much written material.
By way of comparison, my book Personal Development for Smart People is about 83,000 words. More than 95% of what I’ve written has been published on my website for free, so anyone can read it without paying me anything for it. My book was published by Hay House, so it wasn’t self published; I have an exclusive publishing agreement with them.
I also have several hours of audio podcasts and a small bit of video as well.
Over the years I’ve received many requests from people asking permission to share my content in other ways, such as by translating it into other languages or reposting it on their blogs. For a while I gave people permission to do this on a limited basis, but after a couple years I pulled back when it seemed to be getting out of hand. I felt that some people were abusing the limited rights I granted them, and that created some headaches for me.
Some people also came to me with fairly ambitious ideas, such as creating whole web sites in other languages based around my material. I must have received dozens of offers like that, but I always declined them. It seemed too messy, and I was concerned about losing control of my content, which I felt was my #1 business asset.
Copyright Violations
In some cases people would break the law to republish my content without permission. That happens pretty much every day now.
For example, around 2005 I learned that a self-help book was published where the author included two of my copyrighted articles without permission. Not only that, he edited my articles slightly to try to pass them off as his own, literally claiming that my personal stories came from his own life experience. I promptly contacted the publisher, and we worked out a cash settlement, whereby I gave them permission to continue publishing the book as-is. I was easily able to prove that I was the original author since both articles had been previously published in a print newsletter, so I just faxed them copies of it.
I felt I deserved at least some compensation if they were going to keep selling my work, and they readily agreed. Getting into a legal battle isn’t my style, so I really went easy on them. They seemed to relax once they realized I had no interest in raking them over the coals. I think they were pretty pissed at that author though. That book is still being sold today.
More recently I learned that Bob Proctor (from the movie The Secret) released a book called It’s Not About the Money that was heavily derived from my articles, such as 10 Reasons You Should Never Get a Job and 10 Stupid Mistakes Made by the Newly Self-Employed. The derivation is rather obvious since much of it is word-for-word the same and follows my content point by point. Long story short, I was told that Bob’s company hired a ghostwriter, who most likely used my content to create this product, and then it was released as Bob’s own work. The book is currently still being sold in audio, paperback, and Kindle formats. You can find it on Amazon.com. I haven’t received a dime from it.
Now if I were to view reality through an objective lens, I might be pretty pissed. I’m getting ripped off, right?
How do you personally feel about it? Does this bother you at all?
Subjective Reality and Intellectual Property
Since I’m on the subjective side now, I see this situation in a different light than I otherwise would have. Bob and that ghostwriter and I aren’t separate from each other. They are me.
If I look within myself, I would say that the dream character Bob currently represents a part of me that feels phony and false. And why is that part there? Perhaps it’s because part of me feels phony and false claiming ownership of the material I’ve been producing and publishing for years.
The truth is that I can’t really say that I’m the one creating all this content. It flows through me so effortlessly that I don’t really know where it’s coming from. I spent thousands of hours producing all this content, but did I really create it? Sure I worked hard, but I overwhelmingly enjoyed the process. Writing is a peaceful, flowing, and pleasurable experience for me.
When I write in the best way I know how (from inspiration), it’s like my consciousness steps aside, and content flows through me and onto the computer screen. I’m basically a pen. I let the dreamer communicate through me.
How can I possibly blame Bob or his ghostwriter or anyone else who’s tried to pass of my material as their own? If I do that, I’d just be projecting my own issues onto them.
I cannot solve this problem at that level. I could try of course, but what would that “solution” look like? Send Bob some nasty letters maybe. Get an attorney involved. Succumb to negative emotions like blame and resentment. Disconnect from who I really am. No thanks!
In the end, I’d only be fighting with myself, and I’d be injecting more conflict and negative drama into this dream world. That is not an intelligent solution.
To be totally truthful, I have to confess that I’m in the same boat, trying to pass off the dreamer’s content as my own. I’ve been doing that for years. Bob is simply reflecting that back to me. The problem is mine, not his. I’m responsible for it.
To go a little deeper, I would say that I did write a lot of content (hundreds of articles) at the level of my own mind. But by and large, that’s the content that sucks. The best content, the stuff that makes people freak out the most, flows through me, but it is not of me.
Inspired vs. Uninspired Content
Over the years I’ve noticed a strange pattern.
If I write content at the level of my own mind, such as by pulling an idea off my to-do list and mentally working through it point by point, I usually get feedback along the lines of “Great article.” People typically still like it, and they often report good results by applying those ideas. I can’t say this has been a negative experience per se.
But if I write from a place of inspiration, running to the keyboard when an energized idea comes to me out of the blue, something very different happens. First, my writing speed is 2-3 times faster. Sometimes the ideas are flowing through me as quickly as I can physically type.
Second, the feedback I get is very different. Someone ALWAYS reports back that reading that article was a synchronicity for them. Maybe they just wrote about that same topic in their journal the previous night. Maybe it’s exactly what they were wondering about before they read it. Maybe I share some specific detail that’s a major trigger for them.
Another way of explaining the difference between these two styles of writing is that in the first case, I’m writing with an objective lens. I choose topics based on what I think people will want to read, or what might give me a traffic boost, or to create and share value, or to teach, or for some other logical reason.
A good example of such an objectively written article is 10 Ways to Improve Your Technical Skills. It’s an article for the mind, but it doesn’t stir the heart and soul.
In the second case, however, I’m using a subjective lens when I write. I don’t pre-plan what I’ll write about. I simply wait for inspiration to hit me, and then I run with it. Sometimes I’ll write for hours without a break in order to record the ideas that are flowing through me. I get the ideas as mental downloads. I understand the information quickly, and my job is to translate it into words, sentences, and paragraphs. I often use stories from my own life or analogies from my background to explain the concepts more clearly. I’m essentially a human translator.
It was only recently that I really understood what was happening here. When I write subjectively, I’m receiving information directly from the dreamer of this subjective universe. My job is to give those ideas form and substance within the dream world.
As I reached this point of understanding, I was able to go deeper into the experience of subjective writing, more deeply than I’ve ever done before.
A good example of such an article is the last one I posted, Subjective Relationships.
Interestingly, the feedback I received on that article included many reports of synchronicities from my readers, perhaps more than I’ve ever seen. Some people said they were blown away by the mysterious parallels between that article and their own lives.
As far as I can recall, this really is an ALWAYS vs. NEVER thing. I never receive reports of synchronicities from my objective articles, and I always receive at least one synchronicity report after posting a subjective article. I can’t think of a single exception on either side. There is, however, a gray area in the middle, where some portions of articles were inspired and other parts were more mental. In those cases I receive synchronicity reports only about the inspired bits, or about the topic itself.
Now I know that the reason for those synchronicities is that we’re all projections of the same dreamer, so when I write from the dreamer’s perspective, a different form of communication is taking place.
Now that I’m aware of what’s going on, I can more deliberately write subjective articles, and so I expect to see a corresponding increase in the level of synchronicities that my readers report.
Forgiveness
It makes no sense to me to create conflict in the dream world since all conflict is inner conflict. I desire inner and outer harmony. I can’t fall into the trap of fighting with myself.
Trying to protect my copyrights may have made some sense objectively, but it doesn’t make sense subjectively. What am I protecting? And from whom? I’m trying to protect projections from projections, and that makes little sense.
So first I have to forgive myself for succumbing to such foolishness. I was deluded and didn’t know any better.
An inspired idea came to me today, one that struck me multiple times over the past few years. Until today I couldn’t bring myself to act on it. Now I’m ready to move forward with it.
The short version is that I’m going to give people permission to republish my articles far and wide, including translating them into other languages. In practical terms this means that I won’t be “protecting” them via copyright anymore.
I want to move forward on this, but I want to do it in such a way that it makes sense and doesn’t create undesirable complications. So I’m going to share the basics with you now. Then I’ll gather questions and feedback and see if I can craft a good solution that addresses people’s questions, so we can fill in all the gaps about the implementation details.
Copyrighted Material
Up to this point, all of my articles have been copyrighted. I’ve written about 1,000 articles, and I’d estimate they average about 2,000 words each, so that’s approximately 2 million words of content, enough to fill 25 books. It took me nearly 6 years to produce that much written material.
By way of comparison, my book Personal Development for Smart People is about 83,000 words. More than 95% of what I’ve written has been published on my website for free, so anyone can read it without paying me anything for it. My book was published by Hay House, so it wasn’t self published; I have an exclusive publishing agreement with them.
I also have several hours of audio podcasts and a small bit of video as well.
Over the years I’ve received many requests from people asking permission to share my content in other ways, such as by translating it into other languages or reposting it on their blogs. For a while I gave people permission to do this on a limited basis, but after a couple years I pulled back when it seemed to be getting out of hand. I felt that some people were abusing the limited rights I granted them, and that created some headaches for me.
Some people also came to me with fairly ambitious ideas, such as creating whole web sites in other languages based around my material. I must have received dozens of offers like that, but I always declined them. It seemed too messy, and I was concerned about losing control of my content, which I felt was my #1 business asset.
Copyright Violations
In some cases people would break the law to republish my content without permission. That happens pretty much every day now.
For example, around 2005 I learned that a self-help book was published where the author included two of my copyrighted articles without permission. Not only that, he edited my articles slightly to try to pass them off as his own, literally claiming that my personal stories came from his own life experience. I promptly contacted the publisher, and we worked out a cash settlement, whereby I gave them permission to continue publishing the book as-is. I was easily able to prove that I was the original author since both articles had been previously published in a print newsletter, so I just faxed them copies of it.
I felt I deserved at least some compensation if they were going to keep selling my work, and they readily agreed. Getting into a legal battle isn’t my style, so I really went easy on them. They seemed to relax once they realized I had no interest in raking them over the coals. I think they were pretty pissed at that author though. That book is still being sold today.
More recently I learned that Bob Proctor (from the movie The Secret) released a book called It’s Not About the Money that was heavily derived from my articles, such as 10 Reasons You Should Never Get a Job and 10 Stupid Mistakes Made by the Newly Self-Employed. The derivation is rather obvious since much of it is word-for-word the same and follows my content point by point. Long story short, I was told that Bob’s company hired a ghostwriter, who most likely used my content to create this product, and then it was released as Bob’s own work. The book is currently still being sold in audio, paperback, and Kindle formats. You can find it on Amazon.com. I haven’t received a dime from it.
Now if I were to view reality through an objective lens, I might be pretty pissed. I’m getting ripped off, right?
How do you personally feel about it? Does this bother you at all?
Subjective Reality and Intellectual Property
Since I’m on the subjective side now, I see this situation in a different light than I otherwise would have. Bob and that ghostwriter and I aren’t separate from each other. They are me.
If I look within myself, I would say that the dream character Bob currently represents a part of me that feels phony and false. And why is that part there? Perhaps it’s because part of me feels phony and false claiming ownership of the material I’ve been producing and publishing for years.
The truth is that I can’t really say that I’m the one creating all this content. It flows through me so effortlessly that I don’t really know where it’s coming from. I spent thousands of hours producing all this content, but did I really create it? Sure I worked hard, but I overwhelmingly enjoyed the process. Writing is a peaceful, flowing, and pleasurable experience for me.
When I write in the best way I know how (from inspiration), it’s like my consciousness steps aside, and content flows through me and onto the computer screen. I’m basically a pen. I let the dreamer communicate through me.
How can I possibly blame Bob or his ghostwriter or anyone else who’s tried to pass of my material as their own? If I do that, I’d just be projecting my own issues onto them.
I cannot solve this problem at that level. I could try of course, but what would that “solution” look like? Send Bob some nasty letters maybe. Get an attorney involved. Succumb to negative emotions like blame and resentment. Disconnect from who I really am. No thanks!
In the end, I’d only be fighting with myself, and I’d be injecting more conflict and negative drama into this dream world. That is not an intelligent solution.
To be totally truthful, I have to confess that I’m in the same boat, trying to pass off the dreamer’s content as my own. I’ve been doing that for years. Bob is simply reflecting that back to me. The problem is mine, not his. I’m responsible for it.
To go a little deeper, I would say that I did write a lot of content (hundreds of articles) at the level of my own mind. But by and large, that’s the content that sucks. The best content, the stuff that makes people freak out the most, flows through me, but it is not of me.
Inspired vs. Uninspired Content
Over the years I’ve noticed a strange pattern.
If I write content at the level of my own mind, such as by pulling an idea off my to-do list and mentally working through it point by point, I usually get feedback along the lines of “Great article.” People typically still like it, and they often report good results by applying those ideas. I can’t say this has been a negative experience per se.
But if I write from a place of inspiration, running to the keyboard when an energized idea comes to me out of the blue, something very different happens. First, my writing speed is 2-3 times faster. Sometimes the ideas are flowing through me as quickly as I can physically type.
Second, the feedback I get is very different. Someone ALWAYS reports back that reading that article was a synchronicity for them. Maybe they just wrote about that same topic in their journal the previous night. Maybe it’s exactly what they were wondering about before they read it. Maybe I share some specific detail that’s a major trigger for them.
Another way of explaining the difference between these two styles of writing is that in the first case, I’m writing with an objective lens. I choose topics based on what I think people will want to read, or what might give me a traffic boost, or to create and share value, or to teach, or for some other logical reason.
A good example of such an objectively written article is 10 Ways to Improve Your Technical Skills. It’s an article for the mind, but it doesn’t stir the heart and soul.
In the second case, however, I’m using a subjective lens when I write. I don’t pre-plan what I’ll write about. I simply wait for inspiration to hit me, and then I run with it. Sometimes I’ll write for hours without a break in order to record the ideas that are flowing through me. I get the ideas as mental downloads. I understand the information quickly, and my job is to translate it into words, sentences, and paragraphs. I often use stories from my own life or analogies from my background to explain the concepts more clearly. I’m essentially a human translator.
It was only recently that I really understood what was happening here. When I write subjectively, I’m receiving information directly from the dreamer of this subjective universe. My job is to give those ideas form and substance within the dream world.
As I reached this point of understanding, I was able to go deeper into the experience of subjective writing, more deeply than I’ve ever done before.
A good example of such an article is the last one I posted, Subjective Relationships.
Interestingly, the feedback I received on that article included many reports of synchronicities from my readers, perhaps more than I’ve ever seen. Some people said they were blown away by the mysterious parallels between that article and their own lives.
As far as I can recall, this really is an ALWAYS vs. NEVER thing. I never receive reports of synchronicities from my objective articles, and I always receive at least one synchronicity report after posting a subjective article. I can’t think of a single exception on either side. There is, however, a gray area in the middle, where some portions of articles were inspired and other parts were more mental. In those cases I receive synchronicity reports only about the inspired bits, or about the topic itself.
Now I know that the reason for those synchronicities is that we’re all projections of the same dreamer, so when I write from the dreamer’s perspective, a different form of communication is taking place.
Now that I’m aware of what’s going on, I can more deliberately write subjective articles, and so I expect to see a corresponding increase in the level of synchronicities that my readers report.
Forgiveness
It makes no sense to me to create conflict in the dream world since all conflict is inner conflict. I desire inner and outer harmony. I can’t fall into the trap of fighting with myself.
Trying to protect my copyrights may have made some sense objectively, but it doesn’t make sense subjectively. What am I protecting? And from whom? I’m trying to protect projections from projections, and that makes little sense.
So first I have to forgive myself for succumbing to such foolishness. I was deluded and didn’t know any better.
Friday, September 24, 2010
Dream Lovemaking
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One thing I was very curious about was how the dream world perspective would affect my experience of physical intimacy. Would it seem very different if I knew that the woman was a character in my dream world, a projection of some part of me?
This past weekend I had a chance to enjoy some dream world intimacy, so I’ll share what that was like from my perspective.
Fair warning: If your dream character has a subroutine that makes you express resistance to reading about sensuality and/or sex, especially when it’s of a very personal nature, please feel free to skip this post completely. You’ll probably miss some additional insights if you do though. In the meantime I’ll do my best to love, accept, and forgive my own Puritanical side.
Since I started this trial while I was traveling, and since Rachelle and I haven’t been physically together for about a month now (she’s still touring with her play in Canada), I didn’t have anything happening in the area of physical intimacy when I began this 30-day inspiration trial. I’m glad about that though because with all the other shifts this experiment has caused, pacing myself can be a real challenge. Diving into subjective reality while being sexually active might have been a little too much to process when I first started. It took me some time to reach the point where I felt ready for it.
I knew I’d eventually take this step, but when I thought about it in advance, my emotions were all over the place. Sometimes I was excited about it, other times anxious, and other times just plain horny. Mostly I was excited and curious. I really wanted to know what it was like.
For lack of a better term, I arranged a play date with a woman this past weekend. Given a subjective perspective, this was easy; it happened naturally as a result of acting on inspiration. From an objective perspective, it may seem a bit unusual if you’re a fairly traditional person. She and I have only seen each other in person a couple of times, and we hadn’t spent any time alone together. We never dated or kissed or anything like that. We mainly kept in touch online.
Nevertheless, we agreed to get together for a few hours, and we gave each other a green light in advance to do whatever felt good to us in the moment. We agreed that if either of us felt uncomfortable at any point, all we had to do was say the word, and we’d both pause or stop what we were doing and discuss our feelings about it. I liked that we verbalized all of this in advance, or perhaps I was just verbalizing it to myself to gain more clarity. Either way, it put me in a place of feeling free to do whatever I felt like doing with her, without feeling that I had to guess at what she was thinking. So basically, we created a safe space for mutual play.
Of course she knew about my experiment and that I’d be interacting with her like a character in my own dream world.
Since I’m also doing my best to act on inspiration as it arises, I couldn’t plan anything in advance with her. My mind sometimes wanted to race ahead and mentally play out different scenarios with her, but when that happened I would just tell it to chill out and relax. I wanted to be open and receptive when she was with me, not stuck in my head.
Most of all I was really curious. I’ve had sex in lucid nighttime dreams before, which is a lot of fun, but since a lucid dream only lasts minutes (15-20 minutes is a long one), there’s little time for chit chat or foreplay, so it’s normally a jump-and-hump kind of thing. Grab a dream woman and go to town.
Since we’d have hours of time together, and since I felt this wouldn’t be an isolated fling with her, I felt good about going with the flow of inspiration in the moment. I really wasn’t attached to any particular outcome.
I also gave some thought to my challenges with receiving love. I find it so easy to give but much harder to receive. So I gave myself permission in advance to be totally selfish with her. I wanted to fully enjoy her, however that played out, and not feel like I was holding back. After all, she’s my dream character and therefore a part of me. I even shared my thoughts and feelings about this with her in advance.
The night before our encounter, Rachelle and she and I all Skyped together for about an hour. That happened spontaneously, and we had so much fun being silly and sexually suggestive. I think I started out by jokingly telling her that Rachelle and I were discussing what I should do with/to/at her… something involving a blindfold and a piece of fruit. I’ll let you imagine how the conversation progressed from there. Suffice it to say that we shared a lot of laughs and sexy playfulness.
It would be beyond this scope of this article to go into much depth on it, but I want to briefly mention that Rachelle and I do a lot of communicating as we move through this polyamorous space together, and I feel very good about how all of this has been playing out. I’ve noticed that the only issues I really need to work out are my own. When I feel congruent, my relationships with others manifest as harmonious. That’s been a very powerful lesson because it makes life a lot simpler. I can’t possibly fathom the inner workings of the hearts and minds of multiple women at the same time — I found that utterly impossible when I tried. But fortunately I’ve learned that I don’t have to do that. I only have to look within my own heart and mind and create the experience of inner harmony, working through any blocks that surface along the way. When I achieve inner harmony, then everyone “out there” also conveys that they feel good about what’s happening. Consequently, I’m finding it relatively easy to enjoy polyamorous harmony in my life because I know that it’s a projection of inner harmony. Being able to love multiple people is the same thing as being able to love the various parts of myself.
I should also mention that I’ve had to re-think my views on privacy in light of subjective reality. In a dream world, does privacy even have any meaning? To my own avatar, it seemingly matters little. I appear to be comfortable talking openly with anyone about anything. But I also recognize that other characters in this dream world seem to value their privacy. Subjectively then I must interpret these characters as parts of myself that do care about privacy. This perspective helped me realize that there are still parts of me that value some aspects of privacy. For example, I know that if I want more connections, I can simply be more open; if I want to tone them down to avoid becoming socially overwhelmed, I can be a little more selective about what I share. At the moment, the flow of new connections is high but not overwhelming, so I’m happy to maintain an open posture, so to speak. When I start feeling overwhelming, I can back off from blogging and be quiet for a while, knowing that it will reduce the volume of incoming communication.
Anyway… back to our story.
The next day I had an intuitive feeling that my dream playmate was arriving, so I went to my front door and opened it, just as she was pulling up. Gotta love dream timing.
One thing I was very curious about was how the dream world perspective would affect my experience of physical intimacy. Would it seem very different if I knew that the woman was a character in my dream world, a projection of some part of me?
This past weekend I had a chance to enjoy some dream world intimacy, so I’ll share what that was like from my perspective.
Fair warning: If your dream character has a subroutine that makes you express resistance to reading about sensuality and/or sex, especially when it’s of a very personal nature, please feel free to skip this post completely. You’ll probably miss some additional insights if you do though. In the meantime I’ll do my best to love, accept, and forgive my own Puritanical side.
Since I started this trial while I was traveling, and since Rachelle and I haven’t been physically together for about a month now (she’s still touring with her play in Canada), I didn’t have anything happening in the area of physical intimacy when I began this 30-day inspiration trial. I’m glad about that though because with all the other shifts this experiment has caused, pacing myself can be a real challenge. Diving into subjective reality while being sexually active might have been a little too much to process when I first started. It took me some time to reach the point where I felt ready for it.
I knew I’d eventually take this step, but when I thought about it in advance, my emotions were all over the place. Sometimes I was excited about it, other times anxious, and other times just plain horny. Mostly I was excited and curious. I really wanted to know what it was like.
For lack of a better term, I arranged a play date with a woman this past weekend. Given a subjective perspective, this was easy; it happened naturally as a result of acting on inspiration. From an objective perspective, it may seem a bit unusual if you’re a fairly traditional person. She and I have only seen each other in person a couple of times, and we hadn’t spent any time alone together. We never dated or kissed or anything like that. We mainly kept in touch online.
Nevertheless, we agreed to get together for a few hours, and we gave each other a green light in advance to do whatever felt good to us in the moment. We agreed that if either of us felt uncomfortable at any point, all we had to do was say the word, and we’d both pause or stop what we were doing and discuss our feelings about it. I liked that we verbalized all of this in advance, or perhaps I was just verbalizing it to myself to gain more clarity. Either way, it put me in a place of feeling free to do whatever I felt like doing with her, without feeling that I had to guess at what she was thinking. So basically, we created a safe space for mutual play.
Of course she knew about my experiment and that I’d be interacting with her like a character in my own dream world.
Since I’m also doing my best to act on inspiration as it arises, I couldn’t plan anything in advance with her. My mind sometimes wanted to race ahead and mentally play out different scenarios with her, but when that happened I would just tell it to chill out and relax. I wanted to be open and receptive when she was with me, not stuck in my head.
Most of all I was really curious. I’ve had sex in lucid nighttime dreams before, which is a lot of fun, but since a lucid dream only lasts minutes (15-20 minutes is a long one), there’s little time for chit chat or foreplay, so it’s normally a jump-and-hump kind of thing. Grab a dream woman and go to town.
Since we’d have hours of time together, and since I felt this wouldn’t be an isolated fling with her, I felt good about going with the flow of inspiration in the moment. I really wasn’t attached to any particular outcome.
I also gave some thought to my challenges with receiving love. I find it so easy to give but much harder to receive. So I gave myself permission in advance to be totally selfish with her. I wanted to fully enjoy her, however that played out, and not feel like I was holding back. After all, she’s my dream character and therefore a part of me. I even shared my thoughts and feelings about this with her in advance.
The night before our encounter, Rachelle and she and I all Skyped together for about an hour. That happened spontaneously, and we had so much fun being silly and sexually suggestive. I think I started out by jokingly telling her that Rachelle and I were discussing what I should do with/to/at her… something involving a blindfold and a piece of fruit. I’ll let you imagine how the conversation progressed from there. Suffice it to say that we shared a lot of laughs and sexy playfulness.
It would be beyond this scope of this article to go into much depth on it, but I want to briefly mention that Rachelle and I do a lot of communicating as we move through this polyamorous space together, and I feel very good about how all of this has been playing out. I’ve noticed that the only issues I really need to work out are my own. When I feel congruent, my relationships with others manifest as harmonious. That’s been a very powerful lesson because it makes life a lot simpler. I can’t possibly fathom the inner workings of the hearts and minds of multiple women at the same time — I found that utterly impossible when I tried. But fortunately I’ve learned that I don’t have to do that. I only have to look within my own heart and mind and create the experience of inner harmony, working through any blocks that surface along the way. When I achieve inner harmony, then everyone “out there” also conveys that they feel good about what’s happening. Consequently, I’m finding it relatively easy to enjoy polyamorous harmony in my life because I know that it’s a projection of inner harmony. Being able to love multiple people is the same thing as being able to love the various parts of myself.
I should also mention that I’ve had to re-think my views on privacy in light of subjective reality. In a dream world, does privacy even have any meaning? To my own avatar, it seemingly matters little. I appear to be comfortable talking openly with anyone about anything. But I also recognize that other characters in this dream world seem to value their privacy. Subjectively then I must interpret these characters as parts of myself that do care about privacy. This perspective helped me realize that there are still parts of me that value some aspects of privacy. For example, I know that if I want more connections, I can simply be more open; if I want to tone them down to avoid becoming socially overwhelmed, I can be a little more selective about what I share. At the moment, the flow of new connections is high but not overwhelming, so I’m happy to maintain an open posture, so to speak. When I start feeling overwhelming, I can back off from blogging and be quiet for a while, knowing that it will reduce the volume of incoming communication.
Anyway… back to our story.
The next day I had an intuitive feeling that my dream playmate was arriving, so I went to my front door and opened it, just as she was pulling up. Gotta love dream timing.
Thursday, September 23, 2010
Life in a Dream World
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Today is Day 24 of my 30-day inspiration experiment, which also includes viewing everything through the lens of subjective reality.
In this update I’ll share a number of observations on what it’s really been like to view life as a dream for more than three weeks straight.
A Roller Coaster of Emotions
Throughout this trial my emotions have been all over the place. Sometimes I’ve felt incredibly blissful, and other times I’ve felt very stressed.
When I feel stressed, it isn’t related to events coming up or anything like that. My calendar is still essentially blank. So I’m not feeling anxious about anything I “have to” do. If I wanted to I could just be a couch potato for days on end.
I believe this stress has to do with the nature of this experiment. My whole conception of reality has been stretched to the point where I’m actually feeling a sense of loss or grieving with respect to my old life. I’m too far down the proverbial rabbit hole to be able to turn back, so part of me knows this is a permanent shift of some sort. That isn’t easy to accept, and I’m experiencing different waves of emotion as I try to understand the consequences.
“Loss” may be the wrong word. I’m not teary eyed about it. But it’s such a huge change that it sometimes feels like I’m floating through space with no solid ground beneath me.
I don’t have enough familiarity with this way of living to know what’s coming up, so I really can’t predict the long-term consequences. Life has become much less predictable, and the rate of change is extremely rapid.
The changes I’ve experienced as a result of this trial have been incredibly positive, even in the objective sense, but positive change can still be stressful. Events like moving to a nicer home, getting married, or winning the lottery can add a lot of stress to your life.
So that’s what it feels like for me. I love the positive changes, but collectively I’m feeling a lot of stress about it. Fortunately this stress seems to be gradually decreasing over time as I get used to living this way. In many ways I feel like a baby, having to relearn so many things from the ground up. It feels like I’ve torn apart my life, and I’m rebuilding it from fairly basic building blocks. That takes time.
On the other hand, sometimes I’ve been feeling totally blissful, happy, and excited too.
I believe I can handle the stress. I just need to pace myself and take steps to keep the stress manageable. I’m optimistic that the stress feelings will continue to diminish with time. I’m constantly out of my comfort zone, but I expect that given enough time, I’ll eventually become more comfortable with this way of perceiving reality.
Comfort and Grounding
For most of this trial, I haven’t bothered to stick to much of a routine. If this is a dream world, then what’s the point?
Well, I’m starting to realize there is a point to having a routine. Against a backdrop of uncertainty, some daily structure can have a soothing effect. It reduces stress and provides a sense of security and stability.
Feeling like you’re floating through a cosmic wonderland might be exciting for a while, but doing that for weeks at a time can be very unsettling.
Simple things like going for a walk, preparing and eating meals, and even breathing help me feel more grounded. I may know it’s not real, and in a dream world, much of what I do may not even be necessary, but I’m finding good reasons to do those things anyway.
Nighttime dreams are usually very brief, lasting only a matter of minutes. But when you have a dream that lasts for weeks, it really does feel nice to populate the dream world with some persistent structures in time and space, if only for emotional reasons.
During this experiment I’m feeling very appreciative of my home, long-term relationships, and other things that give me a sense of stability. Even eating an apple helps me feel grounded because it’s familiar.
I’m reminded of the scene from the first Matrix movie where Cypher is enjoying a steak dinner with Smith. He says he knows the stuff in the Matrix isn’t real, but he doesn’t care. I can relate to feeling much the same way. I know it’s all dream stuff, but for now I still need to connect with what’s familiar for a sense of stability and grounding.
Synchronicities
On the flip side, the more I embrace the belief that life is a dream, the more the dream world reveals itself as such.
For starters, the number of synchronicities I’m experiencing is way off the scale, and it’s not just with me. All my inboxes have been flooding with similar messages from others reporting a major increase in synchronicities lately. It feels as if the whole dream world is shifting.
I’d say that on average, I’m seeing about 3-5 striking synchronicities every day now. They’ve been coming in nonstop since this experiment started.
Have you seen an increase in syncs in your life this month? I wonder if it’s related to this experiment somehow.
For example, about a week ago, I had the strange inspiration to go rent the movie Alice in Wonderland (the recent version with Johnny Depp). An hour or two before I left my house, someone had just emailed me a quote from the Princess Bride, which is my favorite movie of all time. As I walked into the video store, I saw the Princess Bride playing on a TV there.
On my way home, I was listening to “When Tomorrow Comes” by Eurythmics, the first line of which is:
Underneath your dreamlit eyes, shades of sleep have driven you away.
The song before that one was “Sweet Dreams.” This is on their greatest hits album.
About a block from my house, I see a real rabbit sitting in the middle of the street. He stares at me as I drive within a few feet of him. Funny that I would see him while driving home with Alice.
I watch Alice while having dinner, and the movie is overflowing with subjective reality references like, “It’s just a dream” and “All I have to do is wake up” and “I make the path.” Alice even refers to the Mad Hatter as a figment. At the end of the movie, she leaves her old life behind and gets on a boat. In an objective sense, the movie is only so-so, but it’s a lot more interesting when viewed through a subjective lens.
Reality is practically beating me over the head with validation that yes, this is a dream world. At times I feel that life has been dropping me hints about this, but it took me a long time to see the big picture. The whole 11:11 phenomenon was one of many clues — it makes perfect sense that such events would occur in a dream world.
Dream People
One funny aspect of this experiment is that since I’m doing it publicly, most of the people in my life know about it (or so it seems). So when people email me or call me, they often address me as a character in their dream world or as a projection of mine. Same goes for phone calls.
Objectively I could say they’re just playing along. But subjectively it’s as if they’re finally acknowledging the truth.
I’ve been spending a LOT of time on communication lately. It’s sometimes a challenge to maintain the frame of a dream during an immersive conversation, but I’m gradually getting used to it. I’ve noticed that conversations take on a whole different flavor when I view them through the dream lens and when I address the other person as a dream character.
So far no one that I communicate with regularly has objected to being treated like a dream character. Actually it’s just the opposite. Most people seem intrigued and enjoy playing along, and we end up having some pretty deep conversations as a result. Even people that I thought were very left-brained are revealing different aspects of their personalities that I seldom see. They typically become much more playful, open, and light-hearted.
One day when I was spending time with my dream daughter Emily, I asked her to consider that life might actually be a dream. Then I began pointing things out to her that seemed dream-like. I showed her rooms in my house that have no furniture in them, asking her what kind of real house would have empty rooms like that. It must be a dream house.
Then it started pouring rain, and I took her outside and showed her that it was raining, but the sky was blue, and it was bright and sunny out. I asked her if that seemed at all like a dream. She seemed a bit suspicious while we pranced around in the rain. Was it real rain or dream rain?
On a different day, I took Emily out to dinner. As we were driving back, stopped at a crosswalk, a pedestrian crossed in front of us with an umbrella. I asked Emily why someone would be using an umbrella when it’s not even raining. Must be a dream!
Interacting with dream people is a lot of fun. In fact, I think I’ve been getting over-addicted to socializing during this time because the interactions are just so amazing. On many days I’ve spent hours on the phone.
Lucid Dreaming
Last week I had a lucid dream during a 20-minute nap. Within the dream world, I was in my own kitchen, and I knew that my body was asleep on the couch and that I was definitely dreaming.
I decided to try doing telekinesis in the dream world. I couldn’t make it work at all. At best I was able to possibly make some leaves on a tree rustle a little, but it could just as easily have been explained by a dream breeze. It didn’t really feel like I was controlling it.
In fact, I didn’t seem to wield any special abilities in the dream world at all. The whole experience could just as easily have happened in this reality.
Now this is a strange development indeed. Normally when I have a lucid dream, I’m able to do all kinds of cool things like flying. But not this time.
By believing that I’m dreaming while awake, is it possible that I somehow infected the next deeper level of dreaming with my limiting beliefs about this world?
So far this was the only lucid dream I’ve had during this experiment. I wonder what will happen as I have more.
Dream Food
Some dream characters asked if there was a risk of eating non-vegan food during this experiment.
I don’t see that as a serious possibility since I don’t regard non-vegan items as food. Even in my nighttime dreams, I still eat vegan, and if I ever dream that I eat something non-vegan by mistake, I actually get grossed out within the dream.
I’ve been vegan since 1997, so I’ve been eating this way for most of my adult life (or at least I dreamt it that way). Eating non-vegan dream food would be like eating dream sawdust or dream bugs. I simply have no appetite for such things, regardless of the true nature of reality.
That said, I’ve done a lot of experimenting with vegan dream food. Initially I figured I should be able to eat whatever the heck I wanted. How could it affect me if it’s just dream food? Would the awareness that I’m dreaming be enough to change how the food affected me?
So I consumed lots of complex foods like pasta, pizza, soy lattes, and even some wine.
I stopped exercising completely too. Haven’t been to the gym in weeks. About the only exercise I’ve done was going for some walks.
I also didn’t pay as much attention to hygiene. What does it matter in a dream world? Sometimes I wouldn’t shave for more than a week.
And guess what happened. I gained a few pounds. I started feeling sluggish. I didn’t get sick, but I definitely didn’t feel as good in my dream body.
After a few weeks of that, I began to feel somewhat disgusted with myself. I began having strong cravings for healthier, lighter foods like fresh fruit. I knew I’d feel much better on those foods, even if they weren’t real.
Then I realized that I could be seeing these results because I expected them. My subconscious was still filled with beliefs and memories about how certain foods would affect me, and the effects I experienced were all in line with those expectations.
So I had the thought that if I wanted to have a healthier dream body, I should consume foods that I believed were the healthiest and avoid those that I believed were unhealthy.
So several days ago, I shifted to doing that. I went to a local farmer’s market. I bought the foods I considered the healthiest stuff I could put in my body — celery, cucumber, dark leafy greens, fresh berries, grapes, etc. I hit a sync there too: As I walked up to the farmer’s market, a friend from Toastmasters was just walking out, so we hugged hello right at the entrance.
I began eating foods I believed would make me feel good without negative side effects. And lo and behold, I started feeling much better within a couple days, and the excess weight began to drop off. Presently I’m really craving raw foods, and I know I feel best when I eat mostly fresh produce, so I’m doing 95-100% raw for now. I’m eating mostly fresh fruit, fresh veggies, and greens in various combos. The only cooked item I ate was a stir fry of fresh zucchini, yellow squash, and bell peppers.
Now I’m starting to feel a stronger urge to exercise since I know it will make my dream body feel even better. What kinds of dream exercise might I do to put my dream body into optimal condition?
These may seem like subtle distinctions as compared to the objective perspective, perhaps almost circular in nature, but for whatever reason, everything is different on the subjective side. Even things that were working for me objectively, I have to rebuild them on the subjective side with a new mindset. Eating based on my beliefs doesn’t feel quite the same as eating based on objective nutritional science. The same goes with exercising.
Instead of having to objectively figure out an optimal diet by learning the science behind different foods and doing lots of trial and error, I can now simply eat whatever I presently believe is the healthiest and avoid what I believe to be unhealthy.
This introduces a new level of self-honesty, since it’s harder to delude myself about my own beliefs.
For example, on the objective side I may drink some coffee. The chemistry of coffee is so complex that apparently many scientists still don’t know what to make of it. So it’s easy to justify drinking it. It can mentally place it into the gray area of health by focusing on the potential benefits. Or I can simply enjoy the indulgence.
But on the subjective side, it’s a lot harder to do this. When I ask myself how I honestly believe coffee will affect me, I can’t pretend it’s a health food. I have too much history with it and too many memories of how addictive it is for me and how it messes with my thinking. So for the moment, I must deal with my subconscious expectation that coffee will negatively impact my health.
Subjective Rebuilding
It takes a while to rebuild my life from the subjective side. I feel very fortunate that I have the time to do so because it looks like it’s going to take many more weeks. I’ve made major progress in the area of relationships, and this week I seem to be focusing on health a lot. But I have yet to dive into the career and financial aspects of my life. I sense that’s coming up though, perhaps within the next few weeks. It’s hard to say because I’m just going with the flow of inspiration. Apparently this flow is taking me through a process of recoding my whole life part by part. As I mentioned earlier, this has been somewhat stressful due to all the changes, but it’s also pretty exciting to see it unfold. I’m certainly pleased with the results thus far.
Even in areas where my life may look relatively unchanged, my inner experience has shifted massively. I may be eating similar foods once again, but it feels so different to buy, prepare, and eat foods with a dream world perspective. I know that I have so much more to explore from this perspective.
Right now I mainly want to get the basics right. I don’t want to attempt anything too fancy. I want to see what it’s like to get my overall life working subjectively and to maintain that for a while. Right now I feel like I’m only 30% of the way through this initial process of subjectively refactoring my life. I can see that there’s still a lot more to go.
The Power of Belief
As I move forward with my subjective life, I have a few options when it comes to dealing with beliefs.
The first option is that I can work within the framework of my existing beliefs. This suggests that if I do what I subconsciously believe will work, I can expect a positive outcome. So I have to get clearer about my existing beliefs and stay true to them.
The second option is to condition new beliefs to replace the old ones, and see how those new beliefs affect me. There are a number of different methods for this, but it’s tricky work because beliefs interact with each other. It can also be pretty time consuming because we have a lot of subconscious beliefs.
A third option is to reduce my reliance on beliefs altogether. I can realize that they’re simply experiential filters, and I don’t necessarily need them. There are methods to do this as well, such as Ho’oponopono.
Right now I’m mainly shifting into the first option. I feel intuitively drawn to explore that space first. That’s the space I understand best, and the results I can expect there seem the most stable, grounded, and predictable. That should give me a stable base for exploring other options.
Then I suspect I’ll explore the third option more intently, working to reduce my conditioning and seeing what effect it has. I want to build up more experience living subjectively before I attempt anything like that in earnest though. What I’ve already done so far is enough of a shift to process. I wouldn’t want to add more change to my life just yet. I’m barely able to handle the current pacing.
Beliefs essentially act as experiential filters. They constrain the dream world. I don’t feel ready to release too many of those constraints just yet, but I suspect that with enough experience living this way, I’ll eventually feel ready to explore that part of dream life.
Recoding the Dream
Even though I don’t want to make major changes in this area, I can’t resist the temptation to play around with some dream reprogramming work. It’s too much fun to avoid it altogether.
For starters, I’ve been recoding the dream characters in my life to experience greater financial abundance.
Secondly, I’ve been working to inject more peace and harmony into the dream world, such as by imagining the Wars in Iraq and Afghanistan as ended. I started doing this a couple weeks ago. I’m curious to see if it has any noticeable effect.
As for what technique to use, in a dream world the specific technique doesn’t matter. What matters is that you believe and expect it will work. A method is meaningless unless you create the belief in it, and that belief would be pretty hard to manufacture on the objective side. On the subjective side, however, such a belief arises as a natural consequence of being in a dream world.
I believe I have the ability to make changes in the dream world through the application of thought and intention. I’ve seen this in the past with my own life, and I’ve seen how it’s possible to reprogram other dream characters at times.
One specific method I use is to “remember” a dream character differently and to stop validating a less desirable reality for them. So if they’re currently broke, I refuse to feed any more energy to their brokeness. In my mind’s eye, I remember them as already abundant. And then when I interact with them, I affirm them as enjoying financial abundance right now. If they disagree with me initially (some are ornery), I point out that they must be crazy or blind not to see all the money that’s flowing through their life. Or I imagine them as more flexible and more grateful.
Objectively speaking you could say this is a form of hypnosis. However, I find that it works even if I don’t tell the dream characters what I’m doing on their behalf.
Now maybe you think this is crazy (or I’m just imagining that a dream character might react in that way), but it seems to be working — and in a manner that’s so over the top, I’d have to be blind not to notice that something has shifted. Since I started doing this, and even before I told anyone what I was doing, various dream characters started reporting windfalls of extra money coming to them, often in unexpected ways. That’s been really cool to see. If you haven’t seen this happening in your own life yet this month, you’re about to see it soon. When the money shows up, be sure to receive it with gratitude; say yes to it.
So if you don’t mind, I’m going to remember you as a financially abundant dream character and treat you as such. I’m no longer interested in feeding any energy to your financial struggles. Financial scarcity is so last dimension. I’d rather enjoy a dream world where every dream character can enjoy plenty of abundance.
The subjective mindset takes responsibility to a whole new level. I have to feel a sense of responsibility for everyone in my dream world. I do my best to focus on affirming the positive for them. However, I haven’t practiced this enough to make it an ingrained habit yet, so I still flop into the habit of affirming what’s already present at times. I’ll get better with time.
Does this mean I see myself as some kind of god? No, it just means I’m a dream character with some degree of programming skill. I know how to implant suggestions into the dreamer’s subconscious, and then they manifest in the dream world. I can’t say who the dreamer is, and I don’t always know what the effect will be or if the new commands will be accepted. But I can see that there are effects being created, and they can be pretty intense and dramatic at times.
I’m reminded of these lines from the Depeche Mode song “Lie to Me”:
Experiences have a lasting impression
But words once spoken
Don’t mean a lot now
…
So lie to me
But do it with sincerity
Make me listen
Just for a minute
Make me think
There’s some truth in it
In other words, you don’t have to be loyal to a present reality you don’t want. You can creatively “lie” your way into a new reality. I wouldn’t call this a fake it till you make it approach. Faking it implies you don’t believe it. In this case, you have to know that you have the power to implant commands into the dreamer’s subconscious and that they’re going to manifest in the dream world at some point. When you believe you can do this, the process of implanting a command is as simple as declaring it.
If you don’t believe you can do this, you’re right. If you believe you can do it, you’re also right.
A Special Challenge for Our Forum Community
Since this experiment began, our forum community has exploded with activity. This is the most active month we’ve ever seen, and we’re currently averaging more than 1,000 new posts per day.
I think it would be really cool if in the forums, for at least the rest of the month, we could all focus our energy on creating what we desire. Let’s collectively stop feeding energy to what we don’t want. Let’s stop validating any negativity we see in others. No more pity parties or group griping sessions about what isn’t working. That has never worked. Let us instead affirm the potential we see in each other instead of the lack thereof.
Even if we must creatively lie to each other, I’d love to see what kind of effect that would have. I think it warrants at least a couple weeks of experimentation.
For those who want better relationships, treat them as if they’re already attracting the relationship of their dreams. For those who want more abundance, interact with them as if they’re already rich; even ask them for financial advice. For those who want a new career, affirm that they’re already doing what they love and that they’re inspiring others as well. Treat everyone as the best version of themselves that you can imagine.
We only need a certain number of active members to hold the energy of this experiment. Once critical mass is achieved, the experiment will become infectious. It might even spread to other forums as well.
If you don’t like the results, you can always go back to complaining about what isn’t working in September.
What do you think would happen if we did this as a group? Let’s find out.
Today is Day 24 of my 30-day inspiration experiment, which also includes viewing everything through the lens of subjective reality.
In this update I’ll share a number of observations on what it’s really been like to view life as a dream for more than three weeks straight.
A Roller Coaster of Emotions
Throughout this trial my emotions have been all over the place. Sometimes I’ve felt incredibly blissful, and other times I’ve felt very stressed.
When I feel stressed, it isn’t related to events coming up or anything like that. My calendar is still essentially blank. So I’m not feeling anxious about anything I “have to” do. If I wanted to I could just be a couch potato for days on end.
I believe this stress has to do with the nature of this experiment. My whole conception of reality has been stretched to the point where I’m actually feeling a sense of loss or grieving with respect to my old life. I’m too far down the proverbial rabbit hole to be able to turn back, so part of me knows this is a permanent shift of some sort. That isn’t easy to accept, and I’m experiencing different waves of emotion as I try to understand the consequences.
“Loss” may be the wrong word. I’m not teary eyed about it. But it’s such a huge change that it sometimes feels like I’m floating through space with no solid ground beneath me.
I don’t have enough familiarity with this way of living to know what’s coming up, so I really can’t predict the long-term consequences. Life has become much less predictable, and the rate of change is extremely rapid.
The changes I’ve experienced as a result of this trial have been incredibly positive, even in the objective sense, but positive change can still be stressful. Events like moving to a nicer home, getting married, or winning the lottery can add a lot of stress to your life.
So that’s what it feels like for me. I love the positive changes, but collectively I’m feeling a lot of stress about it. Fortunately this stress seems to be gradually decreasing over time as I get used to living this way. In many ways I feel like a baby, having to relearn so many things from the ground up. It feels like I’ve torn apart my life, and I’m rebuilding it from fairly basic building blocks. That takes time.
On the other hand, sometimes I’ve been feeling totally blissful, happy, and excited too.
I believe I can handle the stress. I just need to pace myself and take steps to keep the stress manageable. I’m optimistic that the stress feelings will continue to diminish with time. I’m constantly out of my comfort zone, but I expect that given enough time, I’ll eventually become more comfortable with this way of perceiving reality.
Comfort and Grounding
For most of this trial, I haven’t bothered to stick to much of a routine. If this is a dream world, then what’s the point?
Well, I’m starting to realize there is a point to having a routine. Against a backdrop of uncertainty, some daily structure can have a soothing effect. It reduces stress and provides a sense of security and stability.
Feeling like you’re floating through a cosmic wonderland might be exciting for a while, but doing that for weeks at a time can be very unsettling.
Simple things like going for a walk, preparing and eating meals, and even breathing help me feel more grounded. I may know it’s not real, and in a dream world, much of what I do may not even be necessary, but I’m finding good reasons to do those things anyway.
Nighttime dreams are usually very brief, lasting only a matter of minutes. But when you have a dream that lasts for weeks, it really does feel nice to populate the dream world with some persistent structures in time and space, if only for emotional reasons.
During this experiment I’m feeling very appreciative of my home, long-term relationships, and other things that give me a sense of stability. Even eating an apple helps me feel grounded because it’s familiar.
I’m reminded of the scene from the first Matrix movie where Cypher is enjoying a steak dinner with Smith. He says he knows the stuff in the Matrix isn’t real, but he doesn’t care. I can relate to feeling much the same way. I know it’s all dream stuff, but for now I still need to connect with what’s familiar for a sense of stability and grounding.
Synchronicities
On the flip side, the more I embrace the belief that life is a dream, the more the dream world reveals itself as such.
For starters, the number of synchronicities I’m experiencing is way off the scale, and it’s not just with me. All my inboxes have been flooding with similar messages from others reporting a major increase in synchronicities lately. It feels as if the whole dream world is shifting.
I’d say that on average, I’m seeing about 3-5 striking synchronicities every day now. They’ve been coming in nonstop since this experiment started.
Have you seen an increase in syncs in your life this month? I wonder if it’s related to this experiment somehow.
For example, about a week ago, I had the strange inspiration to go rent the movie Alice in Wonderland (the recent version with Johnny Depp). An hour or two before I left my house, someone had just emailed me a quote from the Princess Bride, which is my favorite movie of all time. As I walked into the video store, I saw the Princess Bride playing on a TV there.
On my way home, I was listening to “When Tomorrow Comes” by Eurythmics, the first line of which is:
Underneath your dreamlit eyes, shades of sleep have driven you away.
The song before that one was “Sweet Dreams.” This is on their greatest hits album.
About a block from my house, I see a real rabbit sitting in the middle of the street. He stares at me as I drive within a few feet of him. Funny that I would see him while driving home with Alice.
I watch Alice while having dinner, and the movie is overflowing with subjective reality references like, “It’s just a dream” and “All I have to do is wake up” and “I make the path.” Alice even refers to the Mad Hatter as a figment. At the end of the movie, she leaves her old life behind and gets on a boat. In an objective sense, the movie is only so-so, but it’s a lot more interesting when viewed through a subjective lens.
Reality is practically beating me over the head with validation that yes, this is a dream world. At times I feel that life has been dropping me hints about this, but it took me a long time to see the big picture. The whole 11:11 phenomenon was one of many clues — it makes perfect sense that such events would occur in a dream world.
Dream People
One funny aspect of this experiment is that since I’m doing it publicly, most of the people in my life know about it (or so it seems). So when people email me or call me, they often address me as a character in their dream world or as a projection of mine. Same goes for phone calls.
Objectively I could say they’re just playing along. But subjectively it’s as if they’re finally acknowledging the truth.
I’ve been spending a LOT of time on communication lately. It’s sometimes a challenge to maintain the frame of a dream during an immersive conversation, but I’m gradually getting used to it. I’ve noticed that conversations take on a whole different flavor when I view them through the dream lens and when I address the other person as a dream character.
So far no one that I communicate with regularly has objected to being treated like a dream character. Actually it’s just the opposite. Most people seem intrigued and enjoy playing along, and we end up having some pretty deep conversations as a result. Even people that I thought were very left-brained are revealing different aspects of their personalities that I seldom see. They typically become much more playful, open, and light-hearted.
One day when I was spending time with my dream daughter Emily, I asked her to consider that life might actually be a dream. Then I began pointing things out to her that seemed dream-like. I showed her rooms in my house that have no furniture in them, asking her what kind of real house would have empty rooms like that. It must be a dream house.
Then it started pouring rain, and I took her outside and showed her that it was raining, but the sky was blue, and it was bright and sunny out. I asked her if that seemed at all like a dream. She seemed a bit suspicious while we pranced around in the rain. Was it real rain or dream rain?
On a different day, I took Emily out to dinner. As we were driving back, stopped at a crosswalk, a pedestrian crossed in front of us with an umbrella. I asked Emily why someone would be using an umbrella when it’s not even raining. Must be a dream!
Interacting with dream people is a lot of fun. In fact, I think I’ve been getting over-addicted to socializing during this time because the interactions are just so amazing. On many days I’ve spent hours on the phone.
Lucid Dreaming
Last week I had a lucid dream during a 20-minute nap. Within the dream world, I was in my own kitchen, and I knew that my body was asleep on the couch and that I was definitely dreaming.
I decided to try doing telekinesis in the dream world. I couldn’t make it work at all. At best I was able to possibly make some leaves on a tree rustle a little, but it could just as easily have been explained by a dream breeze. It didn’t really feel like I was controlling it.
In fact, I didn’t seem to wield any special abilities in the dream world at all. The whole experience could just as easily have happened in this reality.
Now this is a strange development indeed. Normally when I have a lucid dream, I’m able to do all kinds of cool things like flying. But not this time.
By believing that I’m dreaming while awake, is it possible that I somehow infected the next deeper level of dreaming with my limiting beliefs about this world?
So far this was the only lucid dream I’ve had during this experiment. I wonder what will happen as I have more.
Dream Food
Some dream characters asked if there was a risk of eating non-vegan food during this experiment.
I don’t see that as a serious possibility since I don’t regard non-vegan items as food. Even in my nighttime dreams, I still eat vegan, and if I ever dream that I eat something non-vegan by mistake, I actually get grossed out within the dream.
I’ve been vegan since 1997, so I’ve been eating this way for most of my adult life (or at least I dreamt it that way). Eating non-vegan dream food would be like eating dream sawdust or dream bugs. I simply have no appetite for such things, regardless of the true nature of reality.
That said, I’ve done a lot of experimenting with vegan dream food. Initially I figured I should be able to eat whatever the heck I wanted. How could it affect me if it’s just dream food? Would the awareness that I’m dreaming be enough to change how the food affected me?
So I consumed lots of complex foods like pasta, pizza, soy lattes, and even some wine.
I stopped exercising completely too. Haven’t been to the gym in weeks. About the only exercise I’ve done was going for some walks.
I also didn’t pay as much attention to hygiene. What does it matter in a dream world? Sometimes I wouldn’t shave for more than a week.
And guess what happened. I gained a few pounds. I started feeling sluggish. I didn’t get sick, but I definitely didn’t feel as good in my dream body.
After a few weeks of that, I began to feel somewhat disgusted with myself. I began having strong cravings for healthier, lighter foods like fresh fruit. I knew I’d feel much better on those foods, even if they weren’t real.
Then I realized that I could be seeing these results because I expected them. My subconscious was still filled with beliefs and memories about how certain foods would affect me, and the effects I experienced were all in line with those expectations.
So I had the thought that if I wanted to have a healthier dream body, I should consume foods that I believed were the healthiest and avoid those that I believed were unhealthy.
So several days ago, I shifted to doing that. I went to a local farmer’s market. I bought the foods I considered the healthiest stuff I could put in my body — celery, cucumber, dark leafy greens, fresh berries, grapes, etc. I hit a sync there too: As I walked up to the farmer’s market, a friend from Toastmasters was just walking out, so we hugged hello right at the entrance.
I began eating foods I believed would make me feel good without negative side effects. And lo and behold, I started feeling much better within a couple days, and the excess weight began to drop off. Presently I’m really craving raw foods, and I know I feel best when I eat mostly fresh produce, so I’m doing 95-100% raw for now. I’m eating mostly fresh fruit, fresh veggies, and greens in various combos. The only cooked item I ate was a stir fry of fresh zucchini, yellow squash, and bell peppers.
Now I’m starting to feel a stronger urge to exercise since I know it will make my dream body feel even better. What kinds of dream exercise might I do to put my dream body into optimal condition?
These may seem like subtle distinctions as compared to the objective perspective, perhaps almost circular in nature, but for whatever reason, everything is different on the subjective side. Even things that were working for me objectively, I have to rebuild them on the subjective side with a new mindset. Eating based on my beliefs doesn’t feel quite the same as eating based on objective nutritional science. The same goes with exercising.
Instead of having to objectively figure out an optimal diet by learning the science behind different foods and doing lots of trial and error, I can now simply eat whatever I presently believe is the healthiest and avoid what I believe to be unhealthy.
This introduces a new level of self-honesty, since it’s harder to delude myself about my own beliefs.
For example, on the objective side I may drink some coffee. The chemistry of coffee is so complex that apparently many scientists still don’t know what to make of it. So it’s easy to justify drinking it. It can mentally place it into the gray area of health by focusing on the potential benefits. Or I can simply enjoy the indulgence.
But on the subjective side, it’s a lot harder to do this. When I ask myself how I honestly believe coffee will affect me, I can’t pretend it’s a health food. I have too much history with it and too many memories of how addictive it is for me and how it messes with my thinking. So for the moment, I must deal with my subconscious expectation that coffee will negatively impact my health.
Subjective Rebuilding
It takes a while to rebuild my life from the subjective side. I feel very fortunate that I have the time to do so because it looks like it’s going to take many more weeks. I’ve made major progress in the area of relationships, and this week I seem to be focusing on health a lot. But I have yet to dive into the career and financial aspects of my life. I sense that’s coming up though, perhaps within the next few weeks. It’s hard to say because I’m just going with the flow of inspiration. Apparently this flow is taking me through a process of recoding my whole life part by part. As I mentioned earlier, this has been somewhat stressful due to all the changes, but it’s also pretty exciting to see it unfold. I’m certainly pleased with the results thus far.
Even in areas where my life may look relatively unchanged, my inner experience has shifted massively. I may be eating similar foods once again, but it feels so different to buy, prepare, and eat foods with a dream world perspective. I know that I have so much more to explore from this perspective.
Right now I mainly want to get the basics right. I don’t want to attempt anything too fancy. I want to see what it’s like to get my overall life working subjectively and to maintain that for a while. Right now I feel like I’m only 30% of the way through this initial process of subjectively refactoring my life. I can see that there’s still a lot more to go.
The Power of Belief
As I move forward with my subjective life, I have a few options when it comes to dealing with beliefs.
The first option is that I can work within the framework of my existing beliefs. This suggests that if I do what I subconsciously believe will work, I can expect a positive outcome. So I have to get clearer about my existing beliefs and stay true to them.
The second option is to condition new beliefs to replace the old ones, and see how those new beliefs affect me. There are a number of different methods for this, but it’s tricky work because beliefs interact with each other. It can also be pretty time consuming because we have a lot of subconscious beliefs.
A third option is to reduce my reliance on beliefs altogether. I can realize that they’re simply experiential filters, and I don’t necessarily need them. There are methods to do this as well, such as Ho’oponopono.
Right now I’m mainly shifting into the first option. I feel intuitively drawn to explore that space first. That’s the space I understand best, and the results I can expect there seem the most stable, grounded, and predictable. That should give me a stable base for exploring other options.
Then I suspect I’ll explore the third option more intently, working to reduce my conditioning and seeing what effect it has. I want to build up more experience living subjectively before I attempt anything like that in earnest though. What I’ve already done so far is enough of a shift to process. I wouldn’t want to add more change to my life just yet. I’m barely able to handle the current pacing.
Beliefs essentially act as experiential filters. They constrain the dream world. I don’t feel ready to release too many of those constraints just yet, but I suspect that with enough experience living this way, I’ll eventually feel ready to explore that part of dream life.
Recoding the Dream
Even though I don’t want to make major changes in this area, I can’t resist the temptation to play around with some dream reprogramming work. It’s too much fun to avoid it altogether.
For starters, I’ve been recoding the dream characters in my life to experience greater financial abundance.
Secondly, I’ve been working to inject more peace and harmony into the dream world, such as by imagining the Wars in Iraq and Afghanistan as ended. I started doing this a couple weeks ago. I’m curious to see if it has any noticeable effect.
As for what technique to use, in a dream world the specific technique doesn’t matter. What matters is that you believe and expect it will work. A method is meaningless unless you create the belief in it, and that belief would be pretty hard to manufacture on the objective side. On the subjective side, however, such a belief arises as a natural consequence of being in a dream world.
I believe I have the ability to make changes in the dream world through the application of thought and intention. I’ve seen this in the past with my own life, and I’ve seen how it’s possible to reprogram other dream characters at times.
One specific method I use is to “remember” a dream character differently and to stop validating a less desirable reality for them. So if they’re currently broke, I refuse to feed any more energy to their brokeness. In my mind’s eye, I remember them as already abundant. And then when I interact with them, I affirm them as enjoying financial abundance right now. If they disagree with me initially (some are ornery), I point out that they must be crazy or blind not to see all the money that’s flowing through their life. Or I imagine them as more flexible and more grateful.
Objectively speaking you could say this is a form of hypnosis. However, I find that it works even if I don’t tell the dream characters what I’m doing on their behalf.
Now maybe you think this is crazy (or I’m just imagining that a dream character might react in that way), but it seems to be working — and in a manner that’s so over the top, I’d have to be blind not to notice that something has shifted. Since I started doing this, and even before I told anyone what I was doing, various dream characters started reporting windfalls of extra money coming to them, often in unexpected ways. That’s been really cool to see. If you haven’t seen this happening in your own life yet this month, you’re about to see it soon. When the money shows up, be sure to receive it with gratitude; say yes to it.
So if you don’t mind, I’m going to remember you as a financially abundant dream character and treat you as such. I’m no longer interested in feeding any energy to your financial struggles. Financial scarcity is so last dimension. I’d rather enjoy a dream world where every dream character can enjoy plenty of abundance.
The subjective mindset takes responsibility to a whole new level. I have to feel a sense of responsibility for everyone in my dream world. I do my best to focus on affirming the positive for them. However, I haven’t practiced this enough to make it an ingrained habit yet, so I still flop into the habit of affirming what’s already present at times. I’ll get better with time.
Does this mean I see myself as some kind of god? No, it just means I’m a dream character with some degree of programming skill. I know how to implant suggestions into the dreamer’s subconscious, and then they manifest in the dream world. I can’t say who the dreamer is, and I don’t always know what the effect will be or if the new commands will be accepted. But I can see that there are effects being created, and they can be pretty intense and dramatic at times.
I’m reminded of these lines from the Depeche Mode song “Lie to Me”:
Experiences have a lasting impression
But words once spoken
Don’t mean a lot now
…
So lie to me
But do it with sincerity
Make me listen
Just for a minute
Make me think
There’s some truth in it
In other words, you don’t have to be loyal to a present reality you don’t want. You can creatively “lie” your way into a new reality. I wouldn’t call this a fake it till you make it approach. Faking it implies you don’t believe it. In this case, you have to know that you have the power to implant commands into the dreamer’s subconscious and that they’re going to manifest in the dream world at some point. When you believe you can do this, the process of implanting a command is as simple as declaring it.
If you don’t believe you can do this, you’re right. If you believe you can do it, you’re also right.
A Special Challenge for Our Forum Community
Since this experiment began, our forum community has exploded with activity. This is the most active month we’ve ever seen, and we’re currently averaging more than 1,000 new posts per day.
I think it would be really cool if in the forums, for at least the rest of the month, we could all focus our energy on creating what we desire. Let’s collectively stop feeding energy to what we don’t want. Let’s stop validating any negativity we see in others. No more pity parties or group griping sessions about what isn’t working. That has never worked. Let us instead affirm the potential we see in each other instead of the lack thereof.
Even if we must creatively lie to each other, I’d love to see what kind of effect that would have. I think it warrants at least a couple weeks of experimentation.
For those who want better relationships, treat them as if they’re already attracting the relationship of their dreams. For those who want more abundance, interact with them as if they’re already rich; even ask them for financial advice. For those who want a new career, affirm that they’re already doing what they love and that they’re inspiring others as well. Treat everyone as the best version of themselves that you can imagine.
We only need a certain number of active members to hold the energy of this experiment. Once critical mass is achieved, the experiment will become infectious. It might even spread to other forums as well.
If you don’t like the results, you can always go back to complaining about what isn’t working in September.
What do you think would happen if we did this as a group? Let’s find out.
A Look at Self Help Books
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Not any one or anything is completely perfect. There will be grades of improvement even at the places we think are perfect. So is the case of self improvement. Variety of self help books are deal with bettering one aspect or the other in personal, professional, family or social lives. There can be self help books that deals with communication skills, building self esteem and self confidence. The number of sites that deal with self help books is so high that you are not able to at least test all the self help books available. You don't need to is another thing. Having all the knowledge of self help will not help, but the application of the knowledge you gain from a book or two will do the trick.
People think they can benefit from the advice of professionals who have passed through the different stages of the problems they now suffer. There may be different inhibitions that prevent persons from achieving their full potential. They think with some professional coaching and advice they will be better equipped to achieve the goals of life including professional and personal goals. They believe the words of professionals that achieved what they wanted to in their lives. Different people experience stress, lack of time management skills, lack of interpersonal skills, laziness, lack of concentration, lack of self awareness, poor memory etc are that needs professional support.
Self help books with life experience of different people can motivate people in a new direction. However attaining professionals skills like programming skills can't be achieved through self help books. There can also be areas of personal improvement that can't be fully addressed by self help books. May be self help books can assist a counselor in motivating a person in such a way that he or she wants.
Self help books come extremely helpful in areas like developing self confident, self esteem, interpersonal skills, self motivational thinking, morale boosting, persistence, positive thinking, staying away from negative influences and everything that is required for the success in personal, professional, family and social lives. There can be different self defeating behaviors that need to be addressed permanently.
All so called self help books may not give the same results. There are self help books with pragmatic approach to individual traits modification. Such books will help you quickly identify problem areas and tell you about the steps to be taken to overcome such issues. Then there are self help books that will tell about the problems and no clear way to a solution. Such books are not very useful. You need practical solutions to the problems you encounter.
There can be different places you can look for self help books. The first place you think about can be Amazon.com. There are offline sources also. You can check with your local bookshop manager, who will be able to help you locate the right self help book that will be of real help to you.
Not any one or anything is completely perfect. There will be grades of improvement even at the places we think are perfect. So is the case of self improvement. Variety of self help books are deal with bettering one aspect or the other in personal, professional, family or social lives. There can be self help books that deals with communication skills, building self esteem and self confidence. The number of sites that deal with self help books is so high that you are not able to at least test all the self help books available. You don't need to is another thing. Having all the knowledge of self help will not help, but the application of the knowledge you gain from a book or two will do the trick.
People think they can benefit from the advice of professionals who have passed through the different stages of the problems they now suffer. There may be different inhibitions that prevent persons from achieving their full potential. They think with some professional coaching and advice they will be better equipped to achieve the goals of life including professional and personal goals. They believe the words of professionals that achieved what they wanted to in their lives. Different people experience stress, lack of time management skills, lack of interpersonal skills, laziness, lack of concentration, lack of self awareness, poor memory etc are that needs professional support.
Self help books with life experience of different people can motivate people in a new direction. However attaining professionals skills like programming skills can't be achieved through self help books. There can also be areas of personal improvement that can't be fully addressed by self help books. May be self help books can assist a counselor in motivating a person in such a way that he or she wants.
Self help books come extremely helpful in areas like developing self confident, self esteem, interpersonal skills, self motivational thinking, morale boosting, persistence, positive thinking, staying away from negative influences and everything that is required for the success in personal, professional, family and social lives. There can be different self defeating behaviors that need to be addressed permanently.
All so called self help books may not give the same results. There are self help books with pragmatic approach to individual traits modification. Such books will help you quickly identify problem areas and tell you about the steps to be taken to overcome such issues. Then there are self help books that will tell about the problems and no clear way to a solution. Such books are not very useful. You need practical solutions to the problems you encounter.
There can be different places you can look for self help books. The first place you think about can be Amazon.com. There are offline sources also. You can check with your local bookshop manager, who will be able to help you locate the right self help book that will be of real help to you.
Wednesday, September 22, 2010
30 Days of Inspiration Recap
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My 30 days of inspiration trial ended on Sunday, so I’ll do my best to sum up the overall experience, trying not to repeat what I’ve already shared along the way.
Acting on Inspiration
Acting on inspiration in the moment, as opposed to planning things out in advance, was a very different way of living for me. In some ways I liked it, and in other ways I didn’t.
I enjoyed the feeling of flow from one action to the next. Instead of hesitating or thinking things through, I just dove right in and took action on whatever felt inspired in the moment. That kept me from getting stuck in my head, so there was very little friction in moving from idea to implementation.
Synchronicities increased massively, usually with several occurring each day. I sure noticed a lot of rabbits during this trial.
My 30 days of inspiration trial ended on Sunday, so I’ll do my best to sum up the overall experience, trying not to repeat what I’ve already shared along the way.
Acting on Inspiration
Acting on inspiration in the moment, as opposed to planning things out in advance, was a very different way of living for me. In some ways I liked it, and in other ways I didn’t.
I enjoyed the feeling of flow from one action to the next. Instead of hesitating or thinking things through, I just dove right in and took action on whatever felt inspired in the moment. That kept me from getting stuck in my head, so there was very little friction in moving from idea to implementation.
Synchronicities increased massively, usually with several occurring each day. I sure noticed a lot of rabbits during this trial.
Self Help Books - An American Journey
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Self-help books are a quintessentially American literary form. When de Tocqueville first visited the United States in the nineteenth century, he commented on the fierce individualism and overt religious devotion of the people. These two basic themes - of self-reliance and faith - had already been enshrined in foundation myths such as Benjamin Franklin's famous book of virtues, where he would dutifully record his daily achievements. This was the first "balanced scorecard", so to speak. Of course young Ben Franklin was finally advised to add one final, missing virtue - humility.
Humility is not the first word we might necessarily associate with the lucrative self-improvement industry that has created many millionaires in modern America. Interestingly, the success of self-help books has usually been in inverse relationship to the economic prosperity of the times - it was Depression-era economics that helped spawn the massive success of Dale Carnegie's "How To Win Friends and Influence People" (1937).
Scholars in the self-help field such as Butler-Bowdon have noted a fundamental divide in self-development books, between those that advocate strenuous personal effort and diligence to effect change and those that teach a spiritual reliance on a higher power. This can most clearly be illustrated in the contrast between Tony Robbins books, which stress the autonomy of the individual, and Rhonda Byrne's "The Secret" which is a cosmic ordering classic. These books are rooted in New Thought classics of the early twentieth century and propose a pliant universe that will delivers "feedback" in response to the correct vibrations. An intriguing self-help book that links the two philosophical concepts is "Bustin' Loose From the Money Game" by Bob Scheinfeld, which is a riff on the old saw that the individual creates his own illusion, namely the visible universe.
Many sceptics condescendingly dismiss self-help as literature that peddles false hope to the weak-minded. Yet to deny this cultural form is to also reject some of the basic Enlightenment values of human perfectibility and the possibility of progress. Essentially self-help books are offering packaged hope. They celebrate the idea that certain actions - be they affirmations, goal structures or mere directed thoughts - can deliver tangible and sustainable results. Whereas sanctification of character was a lifelong process for a medieval Catholic, the modern self book prefers the words of St. Paul, that "in a flash, in the twinkling of an eye, we will be changed". (1 Cor 15:52). And some of this messianic fervour can be seen at self help rallies and conventions the world over.
Self help books can serve as both an alternative to traditional belief for the religiously disinclined, or even as an adjunct to Christian beliefs in personal reformation. The term "prosperity gospel" has become a term of criticism for those preachers who make too explicit a connection between material and spiritual success.
It remains to be seen how the genre of self-help literature will develop in coming decades. The electronic globalization of the world has opened up entirely new frontiers of communication between the gurus and the audience - from tweets to social networks to on-line marketing ventures promising a virtual Klondike to be accessed by the power of faith. The best self-help books will not be constrained by the physical page for long.
Finally it should be recognised that self-help literature has moved beyond its original moorings in Depression-era Americana to become a global phenomenon. Tony Robbins books sell worldwide and his explosive, dynamic seminars link the aspirant middle classes of Asia, Europe and the Antipodes. The universal appeal of the self help message is nothing new. The first exponent of self-help literature was of course Samuel Smiles, who penned "Self-Help" in 1859 as the ideal paean to the tremendous Victorian age of industry and endeavour. He was of course British.
Self-help books are a quintessentially American literary form. When de Tocqueville first visited the United States in the nineteenth century, he commented on the fierce individualism and overt religious devotion of the people. These two basic themes - of self-reliance and faith - had already been enshrined in foundation myths such as Benjamin Franklin's famous book of virtues, where he would dutifully record his daily achievements. This was the first "balanced scorecard", so to speak. Of course young Ben Franklin was finally advised to add one final, missing virtue - humility.
Humility is not the first word we might necessarily associate with the lucrative self-improvement industry that has created many millionaires in modern America. Interestingly, the success of self-help books has usually been in inverse relationship to the economic prosperity of the times - it was Depression-era economics that helped spawn the massive success of Dale Carnegie's "How To Win Friends and Influence People" (1937).
Scholars in the self-help field such as Butler-Bowdon have noted a fundamental divide in self-development books, between those that advocate strenuous personal effort and diligence to effect change and those that teach a spiritual reliance on a higher power. This can most clearly be illustrated in the contrast between Tony Robbins books, which stress the autonomy of the individual, and Rhonda Byrne's "The Secret" which is a cosmic ordering classic. These books are rooted in New Thought classics of the early twentieth century and propose a pliant universe that will delivers "feedback" in response to the correct vibrations. An intriguing self-help book that links the two philosophical concepts is "Bustin' Loose From the Money Game" by Bob Scheinfeld, which is a riff on the old saw that the individual creates his own illusion, namely the visible universe.
Many sceptics condescendingly dismiss self-help as literature that peddles false hope to the weak-minded. Yet to deny this cultural form is to also reject some of the basic Enlightenment values of human perfectibility and the possibility of progress. Essentially self-help books are offering packaged hope. They celebrate the idea that certain actions - be they affirmations, goal structures or mere directed thoughts - can deliver tangible and sustainable results. Whereas sanctification of character was a lifelong process for a medieval Catholic, the modern self book prefers the words of St. Paul, that "in a flash, in the twinkling of an eye, we will be changed". (1 Cor 15:52). And some of this messianic fervour can be seen at self help rallies and conventions the world over.
Self help books can serve as both an alternative to traditional belief for the religiously disinclined, or even as an adjunct to Christian beliefs in personal reformation. The term "prosperity gospel" has become a term of criticism for those preachers who make too explicit a connection between material and spiritual success.
It remains to be seen how the genre of self-help literature will develop in coming decades. The electronic globalization of the world has opened up entirely new frontiers of communication between the gurus and the audience - from tweets to social networks to on-line marketing ventures promising a virtual Klondike to be accessed by the power of faith. The best self-help books will not be constrained by the physical page for long.
Finally it should be recognised that self-help literature has moved beyond its original moorings in Depression-era Americana to become a global phenomenon. Tony Robbins books sell worldwide and his explosive, dynamic seminars link the aspirant middle classes of Asia, Europe and the Antipodes. The universal appeal of the self help message is nothing new. The first exponent of self-help literature was of course Samuel Smiles, who penned "Self-Help" in 1859 as the ideal paean to the tremendous Victorian age of industry and endeavour. He was of course British.
Tuesday, September 21, 2010
Integrating Light and Dark
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In previous articles about lightworking and darkworking, I mentioned that both paths ultimately lead to the same place. In this article I’ll explain what that convergence looks like.
Lightworking and darkworking are potent power-building methods. By focusing intently on a unidirectional flow of energy, a strong current can be created, and inner resistance can be overcome. On a practical level, this means that through lightworking or darkworking, you can become a lot stronger than you were in a pre-polarized state.
For a lightworker, this flow takes the form of service. The lightworker focuses on an outward flow of energy through giving, giving, and more giving.
For a darkworker, this flow takes the form of selfishness. The darkworker focuses on an inward flow of energy through taking, taking, and more taking.
Ultimately these are phases of development, not permanent resting places.
Initially, when a non-polarized person focuses on one modality (either lightworking or darkworker), their power can increase dramatically.
Power in this case is your ability to create your reality. Pre-polarized people are generally weak. They have very little power, so they largely play the role of pawns. They don’t know how to use their power well enough, so their creative expression is low.
Pre-polarized people are constantly dissipating their power. They fall into patterns like focusing on what they don’t want, complaining, and giving their power away to others. If they set goals, they usually fail to achieve them. They’re easily distracted and knocked off course. Someone else is always the boss of them. They don’t wield much direct control over their lives.
Polarized people, on the other hand, are focused. Because they’re highly congruent, they create a strong unidirectional energy flow. By getting clear about their deepest desires, they’re able to overcome obstacles more easily.
Generally speaking, highly polarized people have an easy time functioning in society. They know how to use their power to solve practical problems. Lightworkers and darkworkers may channel their power differently, but they can get things done.
You’ll rarely hear polarized people say something like, “I can’t afford that,” as such a statement is an abuse of power. Lightworkers and darkworkers are stronger than that. They know how to channel their power to get what they want instead of inadvertently creating the opposite.
Moreover, lightworkers and darkworkers aren’t into wishful thinking. They’re able to get real results. If they desire something, they can get it. Another reason they’ll rarely say something like, “I can’t afford that,” is that they know they’ll get what they want if they continue to use their power intelligently. It’s not just wishful thinking that makes them focus on their desires. It’s experience.
The Shadow
For a time lightworking and darkworking will generate a strong increase in power. Positive results are generated more quickly. But eventually they reach a point where their power seems to be maxed out. It may even begin to decline.
This is the point where the shadow self needs to be integrated. The shadow is the opposite polarity.
A lightworker’s shadow self includes the voices of greed, selfishness, ambition, competition, lust, and the desire for power.
A darkworker’s shadow self includes the voices of love, caring, compassion, and the desire for authentic connection.
For either modality the initial impulse will be to repress these parts of the self, if they’re even acknowledged.
A lightworker, for instance, may do more inner work to try to transcend thoughts of selfishness, or s/he may try to rationalize or justify his/her actions as a form of service.
Similarly, a darkworker may subtly sabotage relationships and keep people at a distance, so they don’t get too close and point out the compassionate shadow self.
Integration
When the lightworker or darkworker can recognize that they’ve reached this point, then the work of integration begins.
For the lightworker it’s time to recognize that service to self and service to others are not in conflict. The more the lightworker serves him/herself, the more s/he can be of service to others. The lightworker must also recognize that s/he deserves to receive the service of others, and that denying this gift now would be a mistake.
For the darkworker it’s time to recognize that the best way to get what s/he wants is to serve others. The more the darkworker begins to care about others, the more powerful s/he can become. The darkworker must also recognize that s/he actually feels best when sharing value with others, and that denying the value of giving now would be a mistake.
When lightworkers and darkworkers begin to integrate their shadows, they both gain another increase in power. They also increase their alignment with the principle of oneness.
New Frequencies of Power
Unlike the character of Ebenezer Scrooge in Charles Dickens’ A Christmas Carol, transformation doesn’t usually occur overnight. It takes time and patience.
The benefit of polarization is that it helps you learn how to channel power effectively. It also leads to a deeper understanding of the nature of power.
Power can be a nebulous concept at times. Asking questions like, “What should I do?” and “What might I create now?” tend to be difficult to answer. Lots of people answer, “I don’t know.” And so all they know how to do is to continue affirming the status quo. And quite often the status quo is not at all what they really want.
But when the lightworker asks, “How can I help this person?” or when the darkworker asks, “What would give me pleasure?” there’s more clarity. Such questions are usually easier to answer, especially when you consistently stick with one side or the other for a period of years.
The lightworker gets really good at channeling power into service, and the darkworker, into self-centered pursuits. These are limited uses of power, but they’re educational. In the end these training periods can be very worthwhile.
When integration begins, the lightworker and darkworker seek to maintain their focus while expanding the breadth of their power. The goal is to keep the intensity high while broadening the spectrum.
Lightworkers and darkworkers each know how to channel certain frequencies of power. And one of the best ways for them to integrate other frequencies is to learn from each other. Essentially they become each other’s teachers. They may butt heads at times, but among powerful people there tends to be a certain degree of mutual respect as they learn more about the nature of power from each other. Through their interactions the hero and the villain both become stronger, as each becomes more like the other.
More broadly, powerful people tend to attract each other, regardless of their primary polarity.
Interacting with people who have mastered frequencies of power that are very different from the ones you’ve mastered brings about a whole new set of challenges. Can you master a broader spectrum of power frequencies without losing focus?
Can the empire-building darkworker transform into a wealthy philanthropist? Can the service-driven lightworker become an effective marketer?
This transformation can be a disruptive time, but it’s also an exciting time because more frequencies are available for exploration. The path may include many starts and stops. But in the end, the lightworker and the darkworker have the potential to gain each other’s powers, which unlocks more creative energy for all.
In previous articles about lightworking and darkworking, I mentioned that both paths ultimately lead to the same place. In this article I’ll explain what that convergence looks like.
Lightworking and darkworking are potent power-building methods. By focusing intently on a unidirectional flow of energy, a strong current can be created, and inner resistance can be overcome. On a practical level, this means that through lightworking or darkworking, you can become a lot stronger than you were in a pre-polarized state.
For a lightworker, this flow takes the form of service. The lightworker focuses on an outward flow of energy through giving, giving, and more giving.
For a darkworker, this flow takes the form of selfishness. The darkworker focuses on an inward flow of energy through taking, taking, and more taking.
Ultimately these are phases of development, not permanent resting places.
Initially, when a non-polarized person focuses on one modality (either lightworking or darkworker), their power can increase dramatically.
Power in this case is your ability to create your reality. Pre-polarized people are generally weak. They have very little power, so they largely play the role of pawns. They don’t know how to use their power well enough, so their creative expression is low.
Pre-polarized people are constantly dissipating their power. They fall into patterns like focusing on what they don’t want, complaining, and giving their power away to others. If they set goals, they usually fail to achieve them. They’re easily distracted and knocked off course. Someone else is always the boss of them. They don’t wield much direct control over their lives.
Polarized people, on the other hand, are focused. Because they’re highly congruent, they create a strong unidirectional energy flow. By getting clear about their deepest desires, they’re able to overcome obstacles more easily.
Generally speaking, highly polarized people have an easy time functioning in society. They know how to use their power to solve practical problems. Lightworkers and darkworkers may channel their power differently, but they can get things done.
You’ll rarely hear polarized people say something like, “I can’t afford that,” as such a statement is an abuse of power. Lightworkers and darkworkers are stronger than that. They know how to channel their power to get what they want instead of inadvertently creating the opposite.
Moreover, lightworkers and darkworkers aren’t into wishful thinking. They’re able to get real results. If they desire something, they can get it. Another reason they’ll rarely say something like, “I can’t afford that,” is that they know they’ll get what they want if they continue to use their power intelligently. It’s not just wishful thinking that makes them focus on their desires. It’s experience.
The Shadow
For a time lightworking and darkworking will generate a strong increase in power. Positive results are generated more quickly. But eventually they reach a point where their power seems to be maxed out. It may even begin to decline.
This is the point where the shadow self needs to be integrated. The shadow is the opposite polarity.
A lightworker’s shadow self includes the voices of greed, selfishness, ambition, competition, lust, and the desire for power.
A darkworker’s shadow self includes the voices of love, caring, compassion, and the desire for authentic connection.
For either modality the initial impulse will be to repress these parts of the self, if they’re even acknowledged.
A lightworker, for instance, may do more inner work to try to transcend thoughts of selfishness, or s/he may try to rationalize or justify his/her actions as a form of service.
Similarly, a darkworker may subtly sabotage relationships and keep people at a distance, so they don’t get too close and point out the compassionate shadow self.
Integration
When the lightworker or darkworker can recognize that they’ve reached this point, then the work of integration begins.
For the lightworker it’s time to recognize that service to self and service to others are not in conflict. The more the lightworker serves him/herself, the more s/he can be of service to others. The lightworker must also recognize that s/he deserves to receive the service of others, and that denying this gift now would be a mistake.
For the darkworker it’s time to recognize that the best way to get what s/he wants is to serve others. The more the darkworker begins to care about others, the more powerful s/he can become. The darkworker must also recognize that s/he actually feels best when sharing value with others, and that denying the value of giving now would be a mistake.
When lightworkers and darkworkers begin to integrate their shadows, they both gain another increase in power. They also increase their alignment with the principle of oneness.
New Frequencies of Power
Unlike the character of Ebenezer Scrooge in Charles Dickens’ A Christmas Carol, transformation doesn’t usually occur overnight. It takes time and patience.
The benefit of polarization is that it helps you learn how to channel power effectively. It also leads to a deeper understanding of the nature of power.
Power can be a nebulous concept at times. Asking questions like, “What should I do?” and “What might I create now?” tend to be difficult to answer. Lots of people answer, “I don’t know.” And so all they know how to do is to continue affirming the status quo. And quite often the status quo is not at all what they really want.
But when the lightworker asks, “How can I help this person?” or when the darkworker asks, “What would give me pleasure?” there’s more clarity. Such questions are usually easier to answer, especially when you consistently stick with one side or the other for a period of years.
The lightworker gets really good at channeling power into service, and the darkworker, into self-centered pursuits. These are limited uses of power, but they’re educational. In the end these training periods can be very worthwhile.
When integration begins, the lightworker and darkworker seek to maintain their focus while expanding the breadth of their power. The goal is to keep the intensity high while broadening the spectrum.
Lightworkers and darkworkers each know how to channel certain frequencies of power. And one of the best ways for them to integrate other frequencies is to learn from each other. Essentially they become each other’s teachers. They may butt heads at times, but among powerful people there tends to be a certain degree of mutual respect as they learn more about the nature of power from each other. Through their interactions the hero and the villain both become stronger, as each becomes more like the other.
More broadly, powerful people tend to attract each other, regardless of their primary polarity.
Interacting with people who have mastered frequencies of power that are very different from the ones you’ve mastered brings about a whole new set of challenges. Can you master a broader spectrum of power frequencies without losing focus?
Can the empire-building darkworker transform into a wealthy philanthropist? Can the service-driven lightworker become an effective marketer?
This transformation can be a disruptive time, but it’s also an exciting time because more frequencies are available for exploration. The path may include many starts and stops. But in the end, the lightworker and the darkworker have the potential to gain each other’s powers, which unlocks more creative energy for all.
Monday, September 20, 2010
Steve Pavlina Facebook Fan Page
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By popular request (i.e. constant nagging for the past year), I finally created a . If you have a Facebook account, please feel free to friend me there by clicking the “Like” button on that page.
By popular request (i.e. constant nagging for the past year), I finally created a . If you have a Facebook account, please feel free to friend me there by clicking the “Like” button on that page.
Self Help Books Are a Boon
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Through self-help books one teaches oneself to be economically, emotionally and intellectually mature and independent. The whole process has a lot of psychological as well as spiritual base.
Self help books inculcate in the reader the spirit of self-reliance. There are of course likeminded support groups to lean on. It is not a partnership of dependence but of co-operation. Examples can be given of self-help legal practice, homespun advices and many more. In course of time self-help books are leading guides in the field of education as well as business. Psychology plays an important part in the writings of these self-help books. These books have led to self-help movements.
According to prominent psychiatrists the self-help books are quite distinct from the professional counterparts. The latter cannot provide friendship, emotional prop up, first hand experimental knowledge, self-identity, roles in life with a meaning and above all a sense of being belonged. Self-help books links people with any kind of health condition. It is especially applicable to those who are mentally unstable. However everything does not work for everyone. The same applies to these self-help books. People going through similar travails form lobby groups and by sharing problems many knots are untied. Actually self-help books bring about link with like minded people - contact between peers.
The self-help books are based on an ancient concept of autosuggestion. It is repeating to one self the magic words of 'I can! I can!' The books are getting worldwide acclaim from humble beginnings. Self-help legal services are also expanding. The Internet is now an invaluable tool for the popularizing of self-help books. On a gigantic scale free information is being provided leading to self-empowerment.
The self-help concept, now being codified in books, has a long history. It goes back to 2,500 BC when we first come across the advice poems of Hesiod. It is an adaptation of Eastern philosophy and thought. The Stoics of Greece offered similar advice of awakening the powers of the self. The ideas are expressed in ancient proverbs of different cultures of the world from time immemorial. The word self-help found a place in legal parlance when it came to be acknowledged that a person has the right to plead his own case in court of law.
Nothing talks about self-help more lucidly than the famous saying 'Heaven helps those who help themselves'. Samuel Smiles in the late 19th century authored the first book on personal development. The title was Self Help. This principle of self-help or autosuggestion is used widely in the treatment of curing alcoholics and the like. It is the self that cures and the self that destroys. It is a question of awakening the self. These self-help books advise certain techniques to achieve this goal.
In this field of work Dale Carnegie is a famous name in the first half of the 20th century. In 1936 he published his all time best seller - How to Win Friends and Influence People. It reflected his own successful battle against repeated failures. So far 50 million copies have been sold and continues to sell captivating each new generation. Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill also hit the market inspiring people about the power of thought.
Researches show that self-help books have captured the market in a big way covering a wide variety of topics form weight loss to friendship gain. One can teach oneself how to become even a politician and win laurels. There are critics who say that these are easy answers to difficult questions that cannot be really implemented.
Through self-help books one teaches oneself to be economically, emotionally and intellectually mature and independent. The whole process has a lot of psychological as well as spiritual base.
Self help books inculcate in the reader the spirit of self-reliance. There are of course likeminded support groups to lean on. It is not a partnership of dependence but of co-operation. Examples can be given of self-help legal practice, homespun advices and many more. In course of time self-help books are leading guides in the field of education as well as business. Psychology plays an important part in the writings of these self-help books. These books have led to self-help movements.
According to prominent psychiatrists the self-help books are quite distinct from the professional counterparts. The latter cannot provide friendship, emotional prop up, first hand experimental knowledge, self-identity, roles in life with a meaning and above all a sense of being belonged. Self-help books links people with any kind of health condition. It is especially applicable to those who are mentally unstable. However everything does not work for everyone. The same applies to these self-help books. People going through similar travails form lobby groups and by sharing problems many knots are untied. Actually self-help books bring about link with like minded people - contact between peers.
The self-help books are based on an ancient concept of autosuggestion. It is repeating to one self the magic words of 'I can! I can!' The books are getting worldwide acclaim from humble beginnings. Self-help legal services are also expanding. The Internet is now an invaluable tool for the popularizing of self-help books. On a gigantic scale free information is being provided leading to self-empowerment.
The self-help concept, now being codified in books, has a long history. It goes back to 2,500 BC when we first come across the advice poems of Hesiod. It is an adaptation of Eastern philosophy and thought. The Stoics of Greece offered similar advice of awakening the powers of the self. The ideas are expressed in ancient proverbs of different cultures of the world from time immemorial. The word self-help found a place in legal parlance when it came to be acknowledged that a person has the right to plead his own case in court of law.
Nothing talks about self-help more lucidly than the famous saying 'Heaven helps those who help themselves'. Samuel Smiles in the late 19th century authored the first book on personal development. The title was Self Help. This principle of self-help or autosuggestion is used widely in the treatment of curing alcoholics and the like. It is the self that cures and the self that destroys. It is a question of awakening the self. These self-help books advise certain techniques to achieve this goal.
In this field of work Dale Carnegie is a famous name in the first half of the 20th century. In 1936 he published his all time best seller - How to Win Friends and Influence People. It reflected his own successful battle against repeated failures. So far 50 million copies have been sold and continues to sell captivating each new generation. Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill also hit the market inspiring people about the power of thought.
Researches show that self-help books have captured the market in a big way covering a wide variety of topics form weight loss to friendship gain. One can teach oneself how to become even a politician and win laurels. There are critics who say that these are easy answers to difficult questions that cannot be really implemented.
Sunday, September 19, 2010
Hacking Reality: Subjective Objectivity
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As my 30-day subjective reality experiment concluded last month, I shifted to a different mode of living. I finally got used to seeing the world through a dream lens. It was seriously challenging to hold that perspective at first, but after a few weeks, my subconscious took over, and I no longer had to consciously remind myself that this is a dream. Eventually the dream perspective became my default way of thinking.
Freeing Mental RAM
Up until that point, holding that perspective was a major cognitive burden. My mind often felt fried at the end of the day. The experiment required a serious conscious effort, a lot of dedication, and perhaps a twist of fanaticism.
Holding the subjective perspective required a significant amount of mental RAM. Multiple times per hour, I had to keep refreshing that perspective. Otherwise I’d fall back into an objective mindset by default.
This was difficult to be sure. I don’t think I could have succeeded in making this shift if I hadn’t dedicated myself to 30 days of total immersion.
While it can be a fun experience to try holding this perspective for an hour or perhaps an afternoon, doing it as continuously as possible for a whole month is a whole different animal. It’s like the difference between having an idea for a new business and actually starting one. The first is easy and fun; the second can be fun too, but it requires a lot more work. One is dabbling; the other is doing. Most of the gains are only accessible on the doing side; dabbling only gives you a glimpse that something cool is there.
After the point of subconscious integration, everything became easier. Conscious effort was no longer required.
In a way this has been an eerie transition. It almost feels like I’ve shifted dimensions. It’s one thing to condition a new belief about financial abundance or eating healthier, but changing my beliefs about the very nature of reality has really turned my life inside out. This was not an easy transition.
In this article I want to document some of the ongoing effects of this experiment, now that I believe I have a clearer understanding of where this is leading long-term.
Beliefs Are Buried
First, this experiment really drove home how easy it is to take beliefs for granted and not even be aware of how they filter our experiences. Because I made such a big shift in my beliefs in a few weeks’ time, I was able to see the marked contrast between the old beliefs and the new ones. It felt like I went through a major reprogramming of my subconscious.
Most beliefs are subconscious. They run on autopilot. We don’t even notice them.
Installing a new belief is like putting on a Band Aid. At first you can’t help but notice that you have some foreign object sticking to your skin. But after a while, the sensory input patterns stop making impressions upon your conscious mind. You stop noticing the Band Aid. Essentially it becomes a part of you. Then later you see it again, or maybe someone else notices it, and you say to yourself, “Oh yeah… I’m wearing a Band Aid.”
The subconscious mind is very pliable and programmable. That makes it very powerful. But it has a downside as well. Once some programming is installed, it takes more effort to uninstall and reprogram it. A half-assed effort won’t get you very far; you’ll just solidify the old programming by piling more code on top of it.
One of the best ways to change your beliefs is through a process of immersion, which is what I used for making this shift. I consciously set the old beliefs aside and pushed myself to adopt the new beliefs 24/7. And I did it publicly, so other people would hold me accountable and help to push me. It isn’t easy but it works.
Hacking the Mind
As a result of this experiment, my mind seems to be running a different operating system. Instead of running an objective operating system, it’s now running a subjective one.
As with any good operating system, it takes some getting used to, but after a while your comfort level increases, and you don’t notice it so much. You run programs on top of it, but you take the underlying OS for granted much of the time. However, the OS is always running, and it dictates which programs you can and can’t run. You may not notice it, but it’s still doing a lot of work in the background.
What I didn’t realize before this experiment was that a mental OS has constraints that are similar to a computer’s OS.
Every OS has its strengths and weaknesses depending on its architecture. Even if the underlying hardware is the same, switching to a different OS can unlock new capabilities. Some things may be easier with a new OS, if only because you can gain access to new high-level software that’s written for that OS.
On my Macbook Pro, I’m running Mac OS X, but I also have Windows 7 installed. There’s some Windows software I really like, such as The Journal, that isn’t available for Mac OS. So I run Windows programs on my Mac using Parallels, which creates a virtual Windows machine that runs along with OS X.
Objective Subjectivity
When my mind was previously running an objective operating system, it’s strength was running programs that were built upon that architecture. But it wasn’t as good at running subjective programs.
In order to run subjective programs on my objective OS, I first had to run a subjective virtual machine. That allowed me to see reality through a subjective lens. Then I could run subjective programs on top of that.
This was very mentally burdensome though. It took a lot of mental RAM to load a subjective virtual machine into my conscious mind. And that didn’t leave much room for running subjective programs.
For example, suppose I want to try having a conversation with someone as if they’re a dream character, but my underlying subconscious belief is that reality is objective in nature. How can I make this interaction happen?
First, I have to load up my subjective virtual machine. In other words, I have to imagine that reality is a dream while suspending my belief that reality is objective. It takes some conscious mental effort to do that.
Then I have to imagine that other people are dream characters, and I have to retain that perspective while conversing with them. And finally, I have to pay attention to what I’m experiencing.
That’s a lot of mental work! It’s no wonder my brain felt fried at the end of the day.
Moreover, with an objective OS and a subjective virtual machine running on top of it, there wasn’t as much mental RAM available for subjective programs and their data. This turned out to be a serious limitation that prevented me from having the fullest experience of subjective reality. Ultimately it required too much mental effort. I needed to get the subjective OS running natively instead of as a virtual machine on top of an objective OS.
Installing a Subjective OS
My subjective reality experiment was basically a process of installing a subjective OS to replace my objective one. At first I had to run it as a virtual machine. But eventually I was able to get it running natively (i.e. subconsciously).
After this point the cognitive burden was greatly diminished. More mental RAM was freed up, as well as more CPU cycles. This meant that I could run more complex subjective programs. In practical terms, I could do more than have subjective conversations with friends or write subjective articles. Now I could see how to run my whole business subjectively and make plans for the long term, based on reality being a persistent yet flexible dream.
I had to rewrite a lot of code to add useful software to my subjective OS. I had to figure out how to eat, how to exercise, how to have relationships, and so on. I had good programs for these functions on my objective OS, but they couldn’t work the same way on the subjective side. The porting process required a lot of thought.
I’m still going through this process now, but at least I have the basics figured out. I’m able to function just fine, but so much has changed that I’m not living the same way I did before this experiment. It was very much like switching to a new OS on my computer and having to learn all different software. At first, productivity drops because so much is unfamiliar. Now I’m at the point where I have some good basic programs, and I’m able to be moderately productive again. This past week has been very productive for me.
I like the OS analogy since it helps me understand and explain what’s happening, but let’s not overplay it and get into dual booting and such. Dual booting may be a nice option for a computer, but I don’t yet see an equivalently easy way to do that with my brain. Then again, maybe that’s what happens when we go to sleep and have a dream.
As my 30-day subjective reality experiment concluded last month, I shifted to a different mode of living. I finally got used to seeing the world through a dream lens. It was seriously challenging to hold that perspective at first, but after a few weeks, my subconscious took over, and I no longer had to consciously remind myself that this is a dream. Eventually the dream perspective became my default way of thinking.
Freeing Mental RAM
Up until that point, holding that perspective was a major cognitive burden. My mind often felt fried at the end of the day. The experiment required a serious conscious effort, a lot of dedication, and perhaps a twist of fanaticism.
Holding the subjective perspective required a significant amount of mental RAM. Multiple times per hour, I had to keep refreshing that perspective. Otherwise I’d fall back into an objective mindset by default.
This was difficult to be sure. I don’t think I could have succeeded in making this shift if I hadn’t dedicated myself to 30 days of total immersion.
While it can be a fun experience to try holding this perspective for an hour or perhaps an afternoon, doing it as continuously as possible for a whole month is a whole different animal. It’s like the difference between having an idea for a new business and actually starting one. The first is easy and fun; the second can be fun too, but it requires a lot more work. One is dabbling; the other is doing. Most of the gains are only accessible on the doing side; dabbling only gives you a glimpse that something cool is there.
After the point of subconscious integration, everything became easier. Conscious effort was no longer required.
In a way this has been an eerie transition. It almost feels like I’ve shifted dimensions. It’s one thing to condition a new belief about financial abundance or eating healthier, but changing my beliefs about the very nature of reality has really turned my life inside out. This was not an easy transition.
In this article I want to document some of the ongoing effects of this experiment, now that I believe I have a clearer understanding of where this is leading long-term.
Beliefs Are Buried
First, this experiment really drove home how easy it is to take beliefs for granted and not even be aware of how they filter our experiences. Because I made such a big shift in my beliefs in a few weeks’ time, I was able to see the marked contrast between the old beliefs and the new ones. It felt like I went through a major reprogramming of my subconscious.
Most beliefs are subconscious. They run on autopilot. We don’t even notice them.
Installing a new belief is like putting on a Band Aid. At first you can’t help but notice that you have some foreign object sticking to your skin. But after a while, the sensory input patterns stop making impressions upon your conscious mind. You stop noticing the Band Aid. Essentially it becomes a part of you. Then later you see it again, or maybe someone else notices it, and you say to yourself, “Oh yeah… I’m wearing a Band Aid.”
The subconscious mind is very pliable and programmable. That makes it very powerful. But it has a downside as well. Once some programming is installed, it takes more effort to uninstall and reprogram it. A half-assed effort won’t get you very far; you’ll just solidify the old programming by piling more code on top of it.
One of the best ways to change your beliefs is through a process of immersion, which is what I used for making this shift. I consciously set the old beliefs aside and pushed myself to adopt the new beliefs 24/7. And I did it publicly, so other people would hold me accountable and help to push me. It isn’t easy but it works.
Hacking the Mind
As a result of this experiment, my mind seems to be running a different operating system. Instead of running an objective operating system, it’s now running a subjective one.
As with any good operating system, it takes some getting used to, but after a while your comfort level increases, and you don’t notice it so much. You run programs on top of it, but you take the underlying OS for granted much of the time. However, the OS is always running, and it dictates which programs you can and can’t run. You may not notice it, but it’s still doing a lot of work in the background.
What I didn’t realize before this experiment was that a mental OS has constraints that are similar to a computer’s OS.
Every OS has its strengths and weaknesses depending on its architecture. Even if the underlying hardware is the same, switching to a different OS can unlock new capabilities. Some things may be easier with a new OS, if only because you can gain access to new high-level software that’s written for that OS.
On my Macbook Pro, I’m running Mac OS X, but I also have Windows 7 installed. There’s some Windows software I really like, such as The Journal, that isn’t available for Mac OS. So I run Windows programs on my Mac using Parallels, which creates a virtual Windows machine that runs along with OS X.
Objective Subjectivity
When my mind was previously running an objective operating system, it’s strength was running programs that were built upon that architecture. But it wasn’t as good at running subjective programs.
In order to run subjective programs on my objective OS, I first had to run a subjective virtual machine. That allowed me to see reality through a subjective lens. Then I could run subjective programs on top of that.
This was very mentally burdensome though. It took a lot of mental RAM to load a subjective virtual machine into my conscious mind. And that didn’t leave much room for running subjective programs.
For example, suppose I want to try having a conversation with someone as if they’re a dream character, but my underlying subconscious belief is that reality is objective in nature. How can I make this interaction happen?
First, I have to load up my subjective virtual machine. In other words, I have to imagine that reality is a dream while suspending my belief that reality is objective. It takes some conscious mental effort to do that.
Then I have to imagine that other people are dream characters, and I have to retain that perspective while conversing with them. And finally, I have to pay attention to what I’m experiencing.
That’s a lot of mental work! It’s no wonder my brain felt fried at the end of the day.
Moreover, with an objective OS and a subjective virtual machine running on top of it, there wasn’t as much mental RAM available for subjective programs and their data. This turned out to be a serious limitation that prevented me from having the fullest experience of subjective reality. Ultimately it required too much mental effort. I needed to get the subjective OS running natively instead of as a virtual machine on top of an objective OS.
Installing a Subjective OS
My subjective reality experiment was basically a process of installing a subjective OS to replace my objective one. At first I had to run it as a virtual machine. But eventually I was able to get it running natively (i.e. subconsciously).
After this point the cognitive burden was greatly diminished. More mental RAM was freed up, as well as more CPU cycles. This meant that I could run more complex subjective programs. In practical terms, I could do more than have subjective conversations with friends or write subjective articles. Now I could see how to run my whole business subjectively and make plans for the long term, based on reality being a persistent yet flexible dream.
I had to rewrite a lot of code to add useful software to my subjective OS. I had to figure out how to eat, how to exercise, how to have relationships, and so on. I had good programs for these functions on my objective OS, but they couldn’t work the same way on the subjective side. The porting process required a lot of thought.
I’m still going through this process now, but at least I have the basics figured out. I’m able to function just fine, but so much has changed that I’m not living the same way I did before this experiment. It was very much like switching to a new OS on my computer and having to learn all different software. At first, productivity drops because so much is unfamiliar. Now I’m at the point where I have some good basic programs, and I’m able to be moderately productive again. This past week has been very productive for me.
I like the OS analogy since it helps me understand and explain what’s happening, but let’s not overplay it and get into dual booting and such. Dual booting may be a nice option for a computer, but I don’t yet see an equivalently easy way to do that with my brain. Then again, maybe that’s what happens when we go to sleep and have a dream.
Saturday, September 18, 2010
Pacific Northwest Road Trip
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Rachelle and I are planning a 3-week road trip to the Pacific Northwest (USA and Canada). We’ll be leaving from Las Vegas sometime next week.
We’ll begin by driving north to Reno, then west through Sacramento to San Francisco, north to Portland, Seattle, and Vancouver, and east to Calgary. Rachelle will be doing her play in Calgary on October 8th (one performance only), after which she’ll return to Winnipeg for another show. Then I’ll return solo to Vegas, visiting Salt Lake City on the way home.
We’ll probably stay in downtown Reno for one night only, then head to San Francisco the next day. We might stop in Sacramento for a meal along the way, but I don’t expect we’ll stay the night there. I’d like to spend a few days each in the Bay Area, Portland, Seattle, and Vancouver.
Our only significant constraint is that we have to be in Calgary by October 7th at the latest. Otherwise we have some flexibility in how we do the trip.
I’ve never done an extended road trip before, nor has Rachelle. This is something we both wanted to do for the experience. The timing works well for our schedules, and the weather should be nice at this time of year.
My car has only 5500 miles on it, so this trip will add a few thousand more.
I’ve been to Reno once before, and I’ve been to the Bay Area many times, including living there from 1989 to 1991, so I know some cool things to do in those cities. But this will be my first time ever visiting Portland, Seattle, Vancouver, Calgary, and Salt Lake City, so I’d love some suggestions on what to go/see/do in those cities, including where to stay and potentially interesting stops along the way. We have a place to stay in Calgary, but we still need to make arrangements for the rest of the trip.
I’m not planning to travel-blog about the trip. I tried doing that for my 3-week Canada trip earlier this year, but I found it tedious and uninspired, and the feedback was a bit ho-hum too, so I don’t see much value in doing that again. I may still blog along the way if I feel inspired to write, but I’d rather blog about personal growth topics and use trip stories to illustrate points only if it seems to fit. Otherwise I prefer to focus on experiencing the trip as opposed to documenting it.
Have you ever gone on a road trip? If so, what advice would you have for us? Did you enjoy the experience?
Rachelle and I are planning a 3-week road trip to the Pacific Northwest (USA and Canada). We’ll be leaving from Las Vegas sometime next week.
We’ll begin by driving north to Reno, then west through Sacramento to San Francisco, north to Portland, Seattle, and Vancouver, and east to Calgary. Rachelle will be doing her play in Calgary on October 8th (one performance only), after which she’ll return to Winnipeg for another show. Then I’ll return solo to Vegas, visiting Salt Lake City on the way home.
We’ll probably stay in downtown Reno for one night only, then head to San Francisco the next day. We might stop in Sacramento for a meal along the way, but I don’t expect we’ll stay the night there. I’d like to spend a few days each in the Bay Area, Portland, Seattle, and Vancouver.
Our only significant constraint is that we have to be in Calgary by October 7th at the latest. Otherwise we have some flexibility in how we do the trip.
I’ve never done an extended road trip before, nor has Rachelle. This is something we both wanted to do for the experience. The timing works well for our schedules, and the weather should be nice at this time of year.
My car has only 5500 miles on it, so this trip will add a few thousand more.
I’ve been to Reno once before, and I’ve been to the Bay Area many times, including living there from 1989 to 1991, so I know some cool things to do in those cities. But this will be my first time ever visiting Portland, Seattle, Vancouver, Calgary, and Salt Lake City, so I’d love some suggestions on what to go/see/do in those cities, including where to stay and potentially interesting stops along the way. We have a place to stay in Calgary, but we still need to make arrangements for the rest of the trip.
I’m not planning to travel-blog about the trip. I tried doing that for my 3-week Canada trip earlier this year, but I found it tedious and uninspired, and the feedback was a bit ho-hum too, so I don’t see much value in doing that again. I may still blog along the way if I feel inspired to write, but I’d rather blog about personal growth topics and use trip stories to illustrate points only if it seems to fit. Otherwise I prefer to focus on experiencing the trip as opposed to documenting it.
Have you ever gone on a road trip? If so, what advice would you have for us? Did you enjoy the experience?
Maintain Mind, Body and Spirit through Self Help
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"When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and could say, "I used everything you gave me.""
Erma Bombeck (1927-1996) US humorist
What is a Self Help tool?
For me, a self help tool is a skill or technique one can draw on whenever needed, or to maintain mind, body and spirit in a more balanced way.
Maybe confidence needs boosting, or self esteem could be raised a notch or two. There are many self help tools and techniques available which can help release tension, clear the mind, increase awareness, improve personal strategies and pave the way for a brighter and more purposeful future.
Most days will find me use a little self help to enable me to cope better with daily challenges. Maybe I'll use an aromatherapy recipe to help me focus on my writing, have a meditation session to clear my mind, or I might do a little self coaching and self-appraisal if I'm stuck on something. These are but a few of the self help tools I use.
Self help for maintaining mind, body and spirit is similar to practising motivation daily. By utilising self help tools and knowledge on a daily basis, it can provide individuals with improved coping skills during 'the down times'.
There are many self help tools to choose from and you can find them in self help books (paperback and electronic), personal or spiritual development courses, CDs, magazines, self help and self improvement websites, and through coaching programs.
With any self help tool or technique, your rate of return will always equal your rate of effort.
10 simple self help tips you can apply easily:
** Where will you be in 10, 20, or 30 years from now? Spend some time writing down your life goals.
** A high expectation can also bring with it a high level of disappointment. By lowering your expectations of other people, you'll be less disappointed.
** Live in the present moment. The present moment is when you're in the zone.
** Trying to change others to how we want them to be is pointless - the only thing you can successfully change is you.
** Listen for and eliminate negative self talk. Counter the negative talk with a positive response, each and every time.
** Connect with others. You could become a volunteer, join a community, sporting or personal interest group, and learn to meditate. By connecting with others it's possible to establish valuable life long friendships.
** Expand your knowledge base, read magazines and books you normally wouldn't, or watch documentaries. Enrol in further studies and adopt the attitude learning is easy, learning is fun.
** If you have self help books - read them again, if the books contain exercises for you to complete - spend some time working through them. It's all about taking action and changing the I shoulds to I will.
** With the help of a personal trainer, work out (pardon the pun) a suitable exercise program, better still, make it a new lifestyle program.
** Connect with your spiritual self and get to know yourself.
Whilst these are only a few of the self help options available, the possibilities are endless, including both mainstream and alternative. Whichever you choose they are all self help tools which help you maintain mind, body and spirit in a more balanced way.
"When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and could say, "I used everything you gave me.""
Erma Bombeck (1927-1996) US humorist
What is a Self Help tool?
For me, a self help tool is a skill or technique one can draw on whenever needed, or to maintain mind, body and spirit in a more balanced way.
Maybe confidence needs boosting, or self esteem could be raised a notch or two. There are many self help tools and techniques available which can help release tension, clear the mind, increase awareness, improve personal strategies and pave the way for a brighter and more purposeful future.
Most days will find me use a little self help to enable me to cope better with daily challenges. Maybe I'll use an aromatherapy recipe to help me focus on my writing, have a meditation session to clear my mind, or I might do a little self coaching and self-appraisal if I'm stuck on something. These are but a few of the self help tools I use.
Self help for maintaining mind, body and spirit is similar to practising motivation daily. By utilising self help tools and knowledge on a daily basis, it can provide individuals with improved coping skills during 'the down times'.
There are many self help tools to choose from and you can find them in self help books (paperback and electronic), personal or spiritual development courses, CDs, magazines, self help and self improvement websites, and through coaching programs.
With any self help tool or technique, your rate of return will always equal your rate of effort.
10 simple self help tips you can apply easily:
** Where will you be in 10, 20, or 30 years from now? Spend some time writing down your life goals.
** A high expectation can also bring with it a high level of disappointment. By lowering your expectations of other people, you'll be less disappointed.
** Live in the present moment. The present moment is when you're in the zone.
** Trying to change others to how we want them to be is pointless - the only thing you can successfully change is you.
** Listen for and eliminate negative self talk. Counter the negative talk with a positive response, each and every time.
** Connect with others. You could become a volunteer, join a community, sporting or personal interest group, and learn to meditate. By connecting with others it's possible to establish valuable life long friendships.
** Expand your knowledge base, read magazines and books you normally wouldn't, or watch documentaries. Enrol in further studies and adopt the attitude learning is easy, learning is fun.
** If you have self help books - read them again, if the books contain exercises for you to complete - spend some time working through them. It's all about taking action and changing the I shoulds to I will.
** With the help of a personal trainer, work out (pardon the pun) a suitable exercise program, better still, make it a new lifestyle program.
** Connect with your spiritual self and get to know yourself.
Whilst these are only a few of the self help options available, the possibilities are endless, including both mainstream and alternative. Whichever you choose they are all self help tools which help you maintain mind, body and spirit in a more balanced way.
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